Country jokes
Person A: Where do you come from?
Person B: Liberia.
Person A: *speaks softer* Oh sorry, do you come from?
Three guys are escaping from North Korea through a tunnel.
The guards know that they are coming and will shoot them with paintball guns as a warning.
The guys show up and the guards shoot them.
The guys die because the guards used real guns.
- What do you call a bee who flew to United States? - "USB"
In a normal country, you call it Yugoslavia.
In Soviet Russia, it's called aregoslavia.
In a normal country, you call it Yugoslavia.
In Soviet Russia, it's called yugostravia.
If you go to the military and you get sent to a country, how many heads will you blow off?
That number is how many dicks you suck.
What's fast and almost got away?
A Mexican jumping the border.
A whale went to the country Wales for vacation.
When it ended, what did he say? "I had a whale of a time!"
Don't bother; just try to live in England.
EU Delegate: "Sir, your country has the highest corruption and crime rate out of any other member nations. What do you have to say?"
Ambassador: *tries slipping the delegate 40 Euros* "You didn't see any statistics."
The point of war is not to die for your country, but to make the fresh recruit on the enemy's side die for his.
Vladimir Putin, Donald Trump, and Angela Merkel are standing at the shore and are trying to impress each other with the accomplishments of their countries. Putin brags, "We have nuclear submarines which can stay underwater for six weeks without having to resurface!". Trump goes on, "Six weeks? That's nothing. I have the best submarines, they're underwater für at least three months!". Merkel is about to respond, when a giant steel colossus emerges from the sea. A hatch opens, a black uniform appears - "Heil Hitler! We need Diesel."
Fortnite is like America... At one time it was good and free. Now it's neither.
Why do toy bears have small eyes? Because they were made in China.
Canada has free health care, here is a link to some Canada Facts! https://www.1stcontact.com/blog/20-interesting-facts-about-canada
What’s a Mexican’s favorite sport?
Cross-country.
It is interesting how different nations have their dogs make different sounds.
An American dog goes Woof, a Czech dog goes Haf, a Dutch dog goes Blaf, and a Chinese dog goes Sizzle.
What is your arm's favorite military branch? The army.
China has a population of a billion people. One billion.
That means even if you’re a one in a million kind of guy, there are still a thousand others exactly like you.
The cops are still searching for my wife's killer. Luckily, I already fled the country.
Let me tell you how I escaped Iraq. Iran! (;)