Corruption Jokes

What do a politician and a minister have in common?

Both of them will tell you anything to get money from you.

Give a man a gun, and he will rob a bank.

Give a man a bank, and he will rob everyone.

A thief walks up to a man in a suit and pulls out a gun. The thief says: "Give me your money." The man in the suit turns around surprised. He raises his hands and says: "But, wait! You can't do that, I am a Congressman!" The thief replies: "Oh, sorry. Give me MY money."

What is the difference between the government and organized crime?

Only one of them is organized.

What do pretzels and a corrupt government have in common

They are both twisted.

Why is prostitution illegal?

Because when it comes to screwing people and taking their money, the government doesn't want anyone outperforming them.

What is the name of the political party in the United States that was founded in 1971 and has lost a presidential election since 1972, and is more political corrupted than the man boy love association of america because it is politically motivated? Libertarian Party 🤔 💭 💡 😲 🫢 😭 😠 😡 💸 💸 💸 💸 💸 💸 💸 💸 💸 💸 💸 💸 💸 💸 💸 💸 💸 💸 💸 💸 💸 💸 💸 💸 💸

how did steven Hawkins die? he tried to update to windows 10 and his hard drive corrupted

The most corrupt CEOs are those of the pretzel companies. They’re always so twisted.

Russia is so corrupt that Putin was voted most sexiest man.

EU Delegate: "Sir, your country has the highest corruption and crime rate out of any other member nations. What do you have to say?"

Ambassador: *tries slipping the delegate 40 Euros* "You didn't see any statistics."

What do you get when you cross a corrupt lawyer with a crooked politician? Chelsea Clinton.

If you mixed the iraq wheat scandal with the basics card paying other people's dole to your wife and tumble dried it in a royal commission that made your priestly mates look bad what would you get? Tony Abbott's career

Yo hairline caused corruption

“I still don't get it,” responded Little Johnny. “Why don't you sleep on it then? Maybe you'll understand it better,” said the dad. “Okay then...good night,” said Little Johnny and went off to bed. In the middle of the night, Little Johnny was awakened by his baby brother's crying. He went to his baby brother's crib and found that his baby brother had taken a crap in his diaper. So Little Johnny went to his parent's room to get help. When he got to his parent's bedroom, he looked through the keyhole to check if his parents were asleep. Through the keyhole, he saw his mom loudly snoring, but his dad wasn't there. So he went to the maid's room. When he looked through the maid's room keyhole, he saw his dad having sex with his maid. Little Johnny was surprised, but then he just realized something and thinks aloud, "OH!! Now I understand the government! The President is screwing the workforce, Congress is fast asleep, nobody cares about the people, and the future is full of s**t!"

Stephen Hawking only died because he tried to install Windows 10 and his hard drive corrupted

what do you get when you cross a Cuban and corrupt dictator Fidel castro

A teacher was teaching her second-grade class about the government, so for homework that one day, she told her students to ask their parents what the government is. When Little Johnny got home that day, he went up to his dad and asked him what the government was. His dad thought for a while and answered, “Look at it this way: I’m the president, your mom is Congress, your maid is the workforce, you are the people and your baby brother is the future.” “I still don’t get it,” responded Little Johnny. “Why don’t you sleep on it then? Maybe you’ll understand it better,” said the dad. “Okay then...good night,” said Little Johnny and went off to bed.

In the middle of the night, Little Johnny was awakened by his baby brother’s crying. He went to his baby brother’s crib and found that his baby brother had taken a crap in his diaper. So Little Johnny went to his parent’s room to get help. When he got to his parent’s bedroom, he looked through the keyhole to check if his parents were asleep. Through the keyhole, he saw his mom loudly snoring, but his dad wasn’t there. So he went to the maid’s room. When he looked through the maid’s room keyhole, he saw his dad having sex with his maid. Little Johnny was surprised, but then he just realized something and thinks aloud, “OH!! Now I understand the government! The President is screwing the workforce, Congress is fast asleep, nobody cares about the people, and the future is full of s**t!”