Cook jokes
I walked into the kitchen and saw my wife chopping up onions, which made me cry.
Onions was a good dog.
What do you call a rapper who LOVES to cook?
Lil' Seasoning.
Why do most orphans cook for themselves?
They don't have a home cook.
I was kicked out of an orphanage kitchen because I yelled, "Hurry up, some of us have homes to get back to."
Do you know why most men are impressive cooks?
Because with two eggs and a sausage, they can keep women full for 9 months.
What's the difference between you and Hitler? At least he knows how to use an oven.
A zebra couldn't find any grass. Then he saw a monkey cooking. He thought to steal a little, but he was burned in the fore, and the smoke was all over him. But when he went to the ocean, it was still there, and zebras are stuck in this style forever.
How do you know a rapper is ready to cook?
He drops the beet.
I was in cooking class and my teacher said, "Does anyone know what a chopping board is similar to?"
Me and my friend just glanced at each other and burst out laughing.
Long story short, the teacher understood the joke, and now we are both in daily therapy. 😭💀
Why did the monster 🧟♀️ put the cook in a bowl?
He wanted a chef salad. 🥗😂
What do lesbians cook for dinner?
They don't, they just eat out.
A buddy and I checked out some books from a local library. When we returned them, he said, "Your sister works the returns, right?" I told him, "Yes, she does, and she will be here in about five minutes." He said, "Why don’t we put a cookbook in the women’s sports section?" I told him, "I love it!" So I picked out a Reese Witherspoon book.
Did you know that the first French fries weren’t cooked in France? They were cooked in Greece.
If Hitler had a cooking channel: Step one... Turn on the gas.
Remember, children, when you're hungry at 3:00, cook forks for 10 minutes, ok?
What did the kangaroo 🦘 bring to the cookout?
A jump rope!
Crack me, break me, love me, and you ate me--egg.
What do you call it when you light a person in a wheelchair on fire?
Cooking the vegetables.
Why did the rapper become a chef?
Because he knew how to cook up FRESH BEETS!
Why is bacon called bacon and cookies called cookies if you cook bacon and bake cookies?