What did Gordon Ramsay say to Hitler? “Oh my god put them back in the damn ovens! They’re so under-cooked they’re writing fucking diaries!”
So this dude comes home from work one day, and his wife is watching the Food Network. The husband asks, "Why do you watch that? You still cant cook," and the wife responds, "Why do you watch porn? You still cant f*ck."
French fries weren't originally cooked in France. They were cooked in Greece.
My mom was cooking dinner and asked me if I could get her a cutting board
“No I need you to take off your shirt and lay on the island so I can cut some chicken”.
I asked my mom if I can help her out with the cooking, she answered yes. A few hours later dinner was ready and dad came to join. Mother said “honey can you get the mashed potatoes” dad said “why she’s right here”
Women should have the right to choose whether they want to do cooking or cleaning first.
What did the kangaroo 🦘 bring to the cook out?
A jump rope!
What is the best way to end a cook book?
And that’s a wrap
At the library I got in trouble for putting a cooking in the women section
How do emo's like their meat cooked medium rawr
Anyone who says they dont like cats, has never had one cooked right.....
The police department made a new machine that will teleport you back to prison if you commit a crime. The police release 4 criminals. I hacker, a rapist, a serial killer and a drug lord. The hacker tries to hack a bank. The hacker gets teleported back to prison. The drug lord tries to cook meth. The drug lord gets teleported back to prison. Now the serial decides that she want’s to change, but when she see a knife she just can’t help it. He bends down to pick up the knife and the rapist get teleported back to prison
how do you know when your vegetables are completely cooked?
the wheel chair rises to the top
Theres a new cooking programme on bbc1 . The contestants are victims of domestic violence. Its called cant cook .... right hook
Why did the rapper become a chef?
Because he knew how to cook up FRESH BEETS
What made Adam and Eve's marriage perfect?
He didn't have to hear about all the men she could have married, and she didn't have to hear about his Mom's cooking.
In a lesbian relationship which feminazi cooks? None both carpetmunchers eat out
The pie tasted weird today. Then I realized that my mother likes cooking pie WITH human flesh from C town.
I like my humans like I like my chicken................Fully cooked
Why are orphans so skinny? They never learned how to home cook.
