Comedy jokes

Once I tried to tell my friend a joke about dead people... but it went six feet underground...

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Boo.

Boo who?

Don't cry, baby!

What comedy skill can’t any cripple master?

Stand up.

I went up to my mom and asked how humanity started. She said it started with monkeys, so I went up to my dad and asked. My dad said it all started with Adam and Eve, so I told my dad that mom said humanity started with monkeys, and dad said mom was telling her side of the story. LOL🤣

I would roast you, but your mirror does it every time you look into it.

How do you find Will Smith in the snow?

You follow the Fresh prints.

What do you call a bad pun? The pun is not punny!

I told my friend that someone accused him of blowing dead bears. I said I defended him by responding that I saw 1 get up and walk away.

Like this.

We see the movie Aladdin, and Abu steals more than Aladdin. I’m surprised that Abu hasn’t gotten killed yet.

Why do orphans not know if they're lactose intolerant?

Because their dad never came back with milk.

You're really...

In India, 3 things are wide and far everywhere, but no one admits: racism, sexism, and Sunny's jism.

What do you get when the queen farts a noble gas?

What do you get when a dino farts? A blast from the past.

Why are ninja farts so dangerous? They are silent but deadly.

These aren't funny.

How did I get to Iraq? I ran.

Why can't an orphan live peacefully?

Technoblade: As a ghost, he could locate all orphans within 2 weeks.

Why do people hate abortion jokes?

It leaves you with an empty feeling inside.

What do you do if you're ever attacked by a gang of clowns?

Go for the juggler!

I'm writing a movie about 9/11. It's called "September 11th Two Thousand Fun."