Comedy jokes
What did the bird do when he ate the expired worm?
He flew up!
Bro, your humor is so bad I bet you would laugh at this.
A B 💿.
What do you call a funny chicken?
A comedi-hen!
Knock knock. Who's there? Dees. Dees who? Dees nuts!
(Or dees nuts in yo mouth!)
Yo hairline so far back, it goes back to Jesus on the cross!
What do you call an Indian man stuck in a tree?
A leaf.
I would tell you a joke about 9/11, but it would come crashing down on you.
Two girls are at a play and are about to go on the stage.
Ally before the other girl goes on stage: Break a leg!
Rachel: Alright!
On stage, Rachel trips over a stand and breaks her leg.
Rachel calling backstage: I broke my leg!
Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 ate 9. So what was 10 scared of? Because he was in the middle of 9, 11.
ElectroBOOM is a SHOCKING YouTuber! (I can't believe he is still alive!)
In the new Grinch, the Whos would say he stole Christmas, "Get him!" Then the Grinch said, "I'm an orphan!" That changes everything. The Whos said, "What would they do if Max was an orphan?"
What is the difference between a blonde and a mosquito?
Only one of them stops sucking after you slap it.
Not all cat puns are purr-fect; some just have their claws.
Rules of dark humor.
1. Everything shall be touched.
2. If it offends someone, it shall not be touched.
If Bugs Bunny had Down Syndrome:
"Meeeehh, what's up, Downs?"
These are meannnnn.
A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named "Ahmal." The other goes to a family in Spain; they name him "Juan." Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his birth mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes she also had a picture of Ahmal.
Her husband responds, "They're twins! If you've seen Juan, you've seen Ahmal."
"I heard a noise in the basement! I'm gonna go to my friend's house and play Minecraft with him until the noise I heard goes away."
"I heard a noise in the basement. I'm gonna go down there with a bazooka and thirty thousand rounds of pistol ammo and fifty thousand pistols."
Said no horror movie character ever.
And also GTA logic.
Did you hear about the new Pixar movie? It's about cancer patients. It's called "Finding Kemo."
It's a RUF life in Africa.