Come jokes

Q: What did the porn actress say when she opened the door?

A: Make sure to come upstairs!

What’s something you can say in a grocery store and in bed?

"Thanks for coming."

And God said to John, "Come forth, and you shall be granted eternal life."

But John came fifth and won a toaster.

Come, my children, to the bread cult!

I remember waving at this guy in the street. The a**hole didn't wave back... Come to think of it, he was also swinging around a weird stick.

What do you not say to an Emo if you want them to come round? "Wanna hang out."

What makes William Afton and a boomerang common?

They always come back.

Why don't orphans go to the shops? Because when their mum leaves, she's never coming back.

Yo mama so old when she farts, dust comes out.

What's the difference between a dad and the Twin Towers? The Twin Towers went black and never came back, and the dad was black and just didn't come back.

Q: Why do orphans love playing tennis?

A: Because the ball comes back.

What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter what you call him, he's not coming.

Why does Santa come down the chimney? Because he knows he isn't allowed to come in the back door.

Your mama is so ugly, she tried summoning Candyman, but he refused to come!

Here comes the airplane.

9/11 happens the next day.

The terrorists said over the intercom, "We're coming up to our destination, so we can't go over it, we can't go under, we have to go through it."

A teenage boy decides to go see a hooker for the first time and asks his experienced uncle for some tips.

"Uncle, what should I do about the hooker name? Should I ask her real name or should I come up with a name for her myself?"

"Kid, I've been fucking hookers for 20 years and I didn't even know they had names."

How do terrorists feed their babies?

Here comes the airplane...

HERE COMES THE SECOND ONE 👹

People say that they can read people's faces; then how come nobody sees me breaking inside?

Why's it so hard to come out of the closet? Just open the door!