children's jokes
My wife and I just decided we don't want to have children.
So if anyone wants them, our contact information is below.
This isn't a joke, but in some countries, children eat their shit for better digestion when constipated.
Three children play hide and seek. Their names are Silence, Anger, and Parent. Anger counts. Parent hides in the trash. Silence is at the police station.
A policeman looks at Silence and asks: "What is your name?" Silence replies: "Silence." Terrified, the policeman asks: "Where are your parents?" Silence then replies: "Parent is in the trash!" The policeman then asks indignantly: "Are you looking for Trouble?" Silence replies: "No, in fact, Anger finds me."
How do terrorists feed their children?
Here comes the airplane.
What's the difference between onions and children? Nothing, when you cut one everyone around you cries.
Q: What's yellow and floats?
A: A bus full of children.
Heyo, my children, hope you haven't forgotten about our cult!
How do you keep your friends from boring you with pictures of their children?
Every time they show you a new one, you say, "Oh FUCK yeah!"
What's Michael Jackson got in common with Santa?
They both empty their sacks around children.
I call my penis the truth because the truth always comes out of children’s mouths.
KFC doesn't mean Kentucky Fried Chicken, it means "Kill Fat Children."
How do terrorists feed their children?
"Here comes the aeroplane!"
"And here comes the second one!"
Children are like farts.
You can only tolerate your own.
I was at a friend's place yesterday, and... There was a mother, father, three sons, and a daughter.
That night the mother and father started fucking each other. I yelled and told them there are innocent children in this house.
An hour later, they started up again. I walked to their room and they were asleep, so I looked in the brothers' room and all three brothers were fucking the sister.
I sighed at this. "Incest aside, you guys make a cute family." I started, "So Anna, when am I gonna have nieces and nephews?" They stopped instantly and went to sleep. "Thank you," I replied before walking back to my room they let me sleep in and I passed out for the rest of the night.
I once gave birth to 3 children.
What has 4 legs and 1 arm?
A pitbull in a children's play area.
What has ten children crying, naked, and screaming for their parents?
My big green pedo machine.
Ice cream truck drivers are the most sus people on earth. They’re adults who play children’s music and give ice cream to kids who approach their van.
You know why pedophiles get away with molesting children?
Because who are they gonna tell? Not their parents.
The person to make the first cannabinol cookbook had a wife and ate (eight) children.