children's jokes
I still don't know what's the worst, most dangerous place to take your children on holiday, but, for certain, it's either Vatican City or Neverland Ranch.
Come, my children, to the bread cult!
Obama, Trump, and Clinton are on the Titanic. The ship hits the iceberg and is going down.
Obama: "This is terrible! We've got to do something -- save the women and children!"
Trump: "Screw the women and children!"
Clinton: "Do you think we have time...?"
How many children does it take to change a lightbulb?
Not 15, as my basement's still dark.
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
Because 7 broke into a daycare and ate 12 children before burning the building down.
My wife and children are leaving me over my obsession with horse racing.
And they're off!
What is Michael Jackson's favorite thing to eat from? The children's menu.
What do birds and children have in common?
If you shoot them, they die.
Roses are red, bow down to your master, children are fast, but I am faster.
What do you call a group of children who go on strike?
A minor's strike.
Good Lord, any tips on how to kidnap children? I say, "Free candy," and they run.
A woman marries a man and has 7 children. The husband dies, and she marries another man. She has another 7 children, and later the husband dies. A year later she gets married again, and has another 7 children. She dies after a few months.
At the funeral, a man sees the priest looking at the heavens. He walks over and hears the man say, "They're finally together again." The man looks at the priest and says, "With her husband?" The priest looks at the man and says, "No, her legs."
What do you call a large lamp that does illicit things to young children?
A Jacko Lantern!
One day, a class of children were killed in a bus accident, but only some survived. One was praying that he would survive, and the other said, "First time?"
Spend all night in a dark humor webpage.
Go to an orphanage today and read it to them.
And I'm sure if you go to a school for disabled children, they should understand it.
So I became a teacher in a school for disabled children.
A kid wanted to ask me a question, so I told him to stand while he address me. 💀
By the way, infertility is hereditary:
If your parents did not have children, you will not have any.
What is the difference between underaged privileged children with bone cancer and you?
I like you!
Why don't orphan criminals go to jail?
Because they weren't even wanted.
What do Michael Jackson and Santa Claus have in common?
They both leave children's rooms with an empty sack.