children's jokes
What were Michael Jackson's last words? "Take me to the children's hospital."
Farrah Fawcett, upon arriving at the pearly gates, God asked her, for having led such an honest life, to grant her one wish. Farrah simply requested that the children of the world would be safe.
Five hours later, Michael Jackson died.
Why was Michael Jackson so loved? He touched so many children in so many special ways.
Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 murdered 37 children and 41 adults during the ages of 31-35 years old.
She was then sentenced to a 35 year sentence (Colombian stuff) and came out 70 years old. She then continued to go on a spree and murder 41 more people, in 2 months. 3 years later, 6 stabbed 7 as they were friends. 6 was not sentenced, but deemed a hero. He never forgets that moment. Her soul not floating above, but screaming from the torture it's receiving.
Your children grew up faster than it took you to leave for the milk.
What's yellow and can't swim?
A bus full of children.
Did you know penguins can fly if you throw them hard enough? Just like children!
I still don't know what's the worst, most dangerous place to take your children on holiday, but, for certain, it's either Vatican City or Neverland Ranch.
Come, my children, to the bread cult!
Obama, Trump, and Clinton are on the Titanic. The ship hits the iceberg and is going down.
Obama: "This is terrible! We've got to do something -- save the women and children!"
Trump: "Screw the women and children!"
Clinton: "Do you think we have time...?"
How many children does it take to change a lightbulb?
Not 15, as my basement's still dark.
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
Because 7 broke into a daycare and ate 12 children before burning the building down.
My wife and children are leaving me over my obsession with horse racing.
And they're off!
What is Michael Jackson's favorite thing to eat from? The children's menu.
What do birds and children have in common?
If you shoot them, they die.
Roses are red, bow down to your master, children are fast, but I am faster.
What do you call a group of children who go on strike?
A minor's strike.
Good Lord, any tips on how to kidnap children? I say, "Free candy," and they run.
A woman marries a man and has 7 children. The husband dies, and she marries another man. She has another 7 children, and later the husband dies. A year later she gets married again, and has another 7 children. She dies after a few months.
At the funeral, a man sees the priest looking at the heavens. He walks over and hears the man say, "They're finally together again." The man looks at the priest and says, "With her husband?" The priest looks at the man and says, "No, her legs."
What do you call a large lamp that does illicit things to young children?
A Jacko Lantern!