Chess jokes
The farmers were playing chess, and the winner shouted and said: "I killed your horse!"
The second quickly left, and when he returned he said: "We have poisoned all your cows!"
Roses are red, violets are blue, You're so flat we can play chess on your chest!
Life is like a game of chess.
I don’t know how to play chess.
1. What do you call cheese that's not yours? Nacho cheese.
2. Knock, knock. Who's there? Ash. Ash who? Achoo!
3. How does the ocean say hello? He waves.
4. Why can't Elsa have a balloon? Because she will let it go.
5. What do you call your enemy? You don't call it at all.
How did the air beat me at chess? It did that thing, haha!
Why is America so bad at playing chess?
They lost two towers.
How do you play chess with a Catholic?
You put a condom on the bishop.
"No towers? :("
"No queen? :("
Why are the English so good at chess? Because their Queen never dies.
Why did America lose the chess match?
They were down 2 towers.
Why cant Americans play chess?
Because they lost their towers...
Why can’t the USA play chess?
Because they lost their two towers.
Why can't the English play chess? Because they lost their queen. And why can't the US play chess? Because they lost their towers.
Why are English people bad at chess? 'Cause they lost their Queen.
Why can't the US play chess? 'Cause they lost their towers.
Why can't England play Clash, Chess, or Checkers?
Because they lost their queen.
Why can't New Yorkers play chess?
Because they lost their towers.
What do you call a nut who loves the game of chess?
A chess-nut.
Not to brag, but I defeated our local chess champion in less than five moves.
Finally my high school karate lessons came to some use.
The first time you have to do a full body workout in chess.
Why is England's team unfair in chess?
Because 2 rooks = 10 and a queen = 9.