What fell first, the emo kid or the leaf? The leaf, 'cause the emo kid just hung.
Why do orphans become hookers?
'Cause they can call someone "daddy."
Just a pickup line.
"Ayo, bbg, are you Maria? 'Cause you can sure as hell count ME in."
Why couldn't the toilet paper cross the road?
'Cause he got stuck in the crack! *butt crack*
Why did the farmer's wife chase the chickens out of the yard?
'Cause they were using fowl language!
Why can't orphans work at S. C. Johnson? Because it's a family company.
Why did the car drive over the cake?
'Cause it was in tiers!! Lol, sorry this ain't funny.
Why are fish not sleeping? 'Cause the bed is wet.
Sans: Hey Frisk, why didn't the skeleton go to the dance?
Frisk: Why didn't he go to the dance?
Sans: 'Cause he had no body to dance with!
Your mom's been giving me attitude lately, so I told her to shut her mouth. When she did, it caused me to lose 4 inches.
I was wondering why the ball was getting bigger before my eyes.
Then it hit me.
Sailors are coming onto the boardwalk and are met by Colonel Sanders. He asks them, "What is your occupation?" They respond, "We are seamen." So he says, "Well, you better wash up 'cause I'm finger lickin' good!"
I gave her a lift back to her crib because her car wouldn’t start.
Cause she knows how I like it, and that I’m a little young to be in the bed, butt-naked doin' your mom.
I think democracy is a scam. I love men and I love you. I love men and I love you. I love my dog. He won't sleep inside and I shitted my pants. I peed my pants. I smell bad. I took a shower and my dog was like, "Oh my god." I was like, "Oh." I was like, "Oh my god," and then I was like, "I shitted again" and he was like, "Bark bark," cause he's a dog. Thanks for listening.
They said I couldn't drive.
Now they know I can't cause they are all dead.
Why does Sally hate herself? Because Sophie stole her boy.
Why can't Helen Keller drive?
'Cause she's already dead.
Sans: Why did the skeleton go to the party?
Papyrus: Why?
Sans: 'Cause he was too fat and ugly!
Papyrus: AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHA LOLOL,OLOLOL
Why is a sweet potato casserole so sweet? Because it's so sweet to eat!
