Cause jokes
A: Why did Sally fall off the swing?
B: Why?
A: Because she has no arms.
Knock, knock.
B: Who's there?
A: Not Sally.
Joe was eating ice cream while walking on the street. He dropped his ice cream. Why?
B: I don't know, why?
A: Because Sally was driving the car.
Friend (Evan): Did you do some dumb shit?
Me: Hell yeah.
Friend (Evan): Did you get us both in trouble?
Me: Hell yeah.
Friend (Evan): Will I still help you because you are my best friend?
Both: FUCK YEAH!
Why didn't the dog want to play football??
'Cause he was a boxer!
Are you the Lusitania 'cause I wanna fire a torpedo inside you?
my grandfather cant a woman's taco anymore cause his balls fell off from getting to many tacos
Memes
care to explain bitch? it seems thats what youre good at
September 11th is the superior birthday because no one forgets it. #flexingonyoubitches ;)
Your forehead is so big you have to wear a hoodie for the Rock to see your ego because your forehead is so big.
How much does a chimney cost?
It's free cause it's on the house.
Are you a parking ticket? 'Cause you've got "fine" written all over you.
Why can't homeless people buy a house?
'Cause they live on the streets.
Why did the robot eat a lightbulb?
'Cause he was in need of a light snack!
Why do orphans come to me?
'Cause they have someone to call "father."
Hey, how is everyone today? Cause I am feeling great!
I'm never going bungee jumping because a cord bridged me into the world. It's not taking me out.
Cause I am Batman!
My name is Devonair.
When I get a haircut, it's always bald.
Kids make fun of me, they call me "dang-near bald head."
My name is Devonair *dev-on-near*
I always thought they were making fun of me because of my name pronounced near.
Hey, my man, why you got them damn old, stanky-looking Whoopi Goldberg cornrows on you head? Are y'all twins, or boyfriend and girlfriend, 'cause if y'all are, go get married in Color Purple land.
The lasagna I just cooked is for me, my friends, and family. You don't get none because your name is not on the list. You wanna know why? 'Cause you got the whole place smelling like catdog and ass.
Bessie Coleman - I don't want to be a flier cause I am African American.
Is your middle name Fancy Feast?
'Cause your face looks like a can of dog food.