Cause jokes
Why do rappers love the gym?
'Cause they're all about them heavy bars.
Why did the robot eat a lightbulb?
'Cause he was in need of a light snack!
Why can't orphans play baseball?
'Cause they can't find home.
Why do people in wheelchairs get bullied?
'Cause they can’t stand up for themselves.
Russian Santa Claus- You better watch out, You better not cry, cause if you do I will stab your fucking eye, Russian Santa Claus does not fuck around. He's making a list, He's checking it twice... You better leave out some Vodka with ice!
Why does a woman never set boundaries with a Mexican? Cause they will always cross it.
So, a guy walked into the store and said to the worker: "Is this free?"
Then the worker said: "Nope, 'cause I'm on sale!"
What do Viagra and Disneyland have in common?
They both cause you to stand around for an hour waiting for a two-minute ride.
Bessie Coleman - I don't want to be a flier cause I am African American.
Yo mama so fat...
That when she used a jump rope... Every time she jumped caused a giant cataclysm!
Sultan Khan was a courtier in Akbar's court. He wanted to make his son the royal treasurer, but his cunning plans always failed.
Sultan Khan thought that Birbal was the cause of his son's misfortune, so he looked for an opportunity to get rid of Birbal. One day, Birbal was late to the emperor's court. Seeing this, Sultan Khan said, "Your Majesty, don't you think that Birbal is taking advantage of his position because he has been late these days?"
"This must be another plan to trap Birbal," said Akbar. So he decided to wait and see what Birbal would do. Akbar sat next to Suman Khan and said, "Yes, he must be punished."
Suman Khan was amazed to see his plan work this time. "From now, you should not agree to anything he says today," Akbar replied, "Agreed."
Soon, Birbal came to court. "Please spare me for being late. My wife was unwell." Akbar immediately said, "No."
Birbal was surprised. He tried again by saying, "But that's the truth. Please believe me." Again, Akbar replied, "No."
"There must be something going on," thought Birbal to himself. Then he asked, "Can we discuss important matters today?" Akbar immediately replied, "No, we will not."
"Then may I go home?" asked Birbal. Akbar said, "No, you will stay here this evening," said Akbar, enjoying himself. Birbal understood what was happening.
"Oh, so this is my game. The emperor is saying no to all my questions." He looked around and saw Suman Khan smiling, seeing him in trouble. "This must be his idea. Let me teach him a lesson."
The clever Birbal thought to Akbar, "Very well," he said. "But I have a last request. Will you please listen to me?" Akbar saw what Birbal had done.
He was very pleased and called loudly, "No, I will not listen to you." That is all Birbal said before returning to his seat. Suman Khan was stunned and angry, and Birbal had outwitted him, so he could not make his son the treasurer.
Why did 1 eat 2?
'Cause he was hungry.
Q: Why are the 49ers called the 49ers?
A: 'Cause they can't make it past the 50-yard line.
I'm hard right now.
'Cause you're a DICKstraction. ;)
Why did the skeleton die from laughter?
'Cause they broke all his "funny bones!"
Yo mama must be a giant, 'cause my Mini P.E.K.K.A. goes berserk on her!
Hi, I am just wondering who went into my account, 'cause I've changed my password, by the way.
Why is a ketchup bottle like a kid? Cause they're like, "Squirt!" (squirt ketchup).
Why did the chicken cross the road?
'Cause it was stapled to the chicken.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
'Cause they don’t know where home is.