Car jokes

What's the difference between a car and a car?

I have absolutely no idea, sorry.

What do you call a sheep obsessed with cars? A Lambo.

What time is it when you get hit by a car? Time to die.

Kaj je pomaranča rekla, ko jo je povozil avto?

What’s the difference between my mom and the Twin Towers?

My mom got hit by two cars. The Twin Towers got hit by two planes.

What do you call a Chinese car thief?

Tommy Tookamota.

Why did the rhino eat the car?

Poop.

A penis is driving a car when all of a sudden it gets hit by a car, what did the penis end up saying?

Aaaawwwww I got dicklash!

Why did the car drive over the cake?

'Cause it was in tiers!! Lol, sorry this ain't funny.

My sister said, "LET'S GO TO PIZZA!" So, I went to the pizza shop with her and she replied, "We really only needed the car?"

This guy went to the gas station to get some gas, and as he asked the cashier for gas he noticed a terrible smell. He asked what the smell was and the cashier replied, "That's your gas, cuz I farted. Now hand me the 20 bucks!"

The guy said, "No, not the kind that comes from your ass, but the kind you put in a car!" The cashier says, "That fart was worth 20 bucks, so beat it!"

Guy says, "I need real gas, nothing about your ass impresses me!" Then another guy gets in line and says, "I know the guy personally, we grew up together. Always trying to be the cool kid in school, bragging about his big horse's ass...no wonder he was always the *butt* of all jokes!"

My teacher asks all of us in class, "What is your favorite thing in the world?"

Josh: Cookies.

Jacob: My parents.

Erika: My Friends!

Brody: Lamborghinis.

Me: Pulling over in a car in the middle of nowhere at night with my girlfriend and getting in the back seat where the magic happens... ;-)

My Teacher: Ok, everyone that was all good...WAIT A DANG SECOND!

*Everyone Looks at Me With A Weird Face....

They said I couldn't drive.

Now they know I can't cause they are all dead.

Why can't Helen Keller drive?

'Cause she's already dead.

What has a magic car? A magic dog.

Your mum is so fat, she gets hit by a parked car!

What car do elves drive?

Toy-yodas.

Why did Paul Walker die? Because he crashed a car into a tree.

Why did ItsFunneh go on the road? She so Draco looking at a car then the car runs over him, sad Draco.

So I gave a disabled kid hot wheels. I mean cars, no I gave him literal hot wheels!