Car jokes
Why should you never throw grandpa's false teeth at a vehicle? You might denture car.
I braced myself when I got in the car, but then I realized my wife wasn't driving.
Bored? Run over an orphan with your car! What are they going to do, tell their nonexistent parents?
There was a kid and a historian in a museum about WW2 and were looking at Hitler in a car doing the Nazi salute. The kid said, “Why is he putting his arm in the air?” The historian said, “Indicators on cars didn’t exist back then so he’s probably saying take the Third Reich!”
Stig
Stacy: Honey, I'm kinda new to texting, what does lol mean?
Justin: I'm not sure, "lots of love," I guess.
Margaret: Stacy, are you there? I don't know if you heard, but Amber and her three kids were killed in a car crash this morning. I'm in total shock!
Stacy: lol
I’m going back to the house to get some stuff for my dad, and then I’m going to have a car and a birthday party come up for the weekend at the end of the week. I was going to get my birthday cake for the day.
How do you get 50 babies into a car?
You blend them.
They say that bad things happen to good people.
So if you get run over by a car just know you're a good person.
As the car crashed, someone said, "I see a light!"
My dad seen RuPaul's Drag Race?
Asked when will they do up the cars!
My gf told me I have to be more in touch with my feminine side, so I crashed the car.
You were born on a highway in a car crash, I wonder why.
What plate do you need to eat in a car? A license plate!
What's the difference between when I opened the window in a car wash and when Kawhi Leonard did it? At least my dad didn't get shot in the eye.
A: Why did Sally fall off the swing?
B: Why?
A: Because she has no arms.
Knock, knock.
B: Who's there?
A: Not Sally.
Joe was eating ice cream while walking on the street. He dropped his ice cream. Why?
B: I don't know, why?
A: Because Sally was driving the car.
Why was Elon Musk unable to land a job as a television host at NBC?
His own car cannot catch up with Jay Leno's Corvette!
Why does Zac say he works at McDonald's? Because Aaron go errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
Who's Paul Walker's close friend?
Tree.
I got a GTR yesterday, now my kids say, "GTR we there yet?"