As the car crashed, someone said, "I see a light!"
One day a mom who looked like a pig broke the car down.
Looking at me is like being on your phone, in a car, on a long trip. You're fine for the first 10 minutes, then after that you feel sick.
Are you lightning?
Because you're McQueen.
A Ford?
Your mama is such a hoe! It took her 4 attempts to pass her driving test. She couldn't get used to the front seat.
I braced myself when I got in the car, but then I realized my wife wasn't driving.
Your forehead [is] so big scientists measured it, studied it, and then finally they said: "Oh my God... your forehead is so big it's a 50 mile car ride from your eyebrows to your hair!"
Kid: Hey, Mum, why are we pushing the car off the cliff?
Mum: Shut up, son, you’ll wake your father!
Who's Paul Walker's close friend?
Tree.
Why does Zac say he works at McDonald's? Because Aaron go errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
Why was Elon Musk unable to land a job as a television host at NBC?
His own car cannot catch up with Jay Leno's Corvette!
I’m going back to the house to get some stuff for my dad, and then I’m going to have a car and a birthday party come up for the weekend at the end of the week. I was going to get my birthday cake for the day.
Stig
There was a kid and a historian in a museum about WW2 and were looking at Hitler in a car doing the Nazi salute. The kid said, “Why is he putting his arm in the air?” The historian said, “Indicators on cars didn’t exist back then so he’s probably saying take the Third Reich!”
Stacy: Honey, I'm kinda new to texting, what does lol mean?
Justin: I'm not sure, "lots of love," I guess.
Margaret: Stacy, are you there? I don't know if you heard, but Amber and her three kids were killed in a car crash this morning. I'm in total shock!
Stacy: lol
If blind people could play go-kart, it very quickly turns into bumper cars.
You were born on a highway in a car crash, I wonder why.
My dad seen RuPaul's Drag Race?
Asked when will they do up the cars!
What plate do you need to eat in a car? A license plate!
