Car

Car jokes

Loyalty

Who is more loyal: a dog or a wife?

Well, lock them both in your trunk for two hours and drive around and see which one is happy to see you.

Dog

I love taking my daughter out in the car. Every time we go over a speed bump, I tell her we ran over another dog. 😂

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  • Accident

    A man hits a woman with his car. Whose fault was it?

    The man, why was he driving in the kitchen?

    Beer

    One day a father went out for some cold beer and threw the 18 pack in the back seat on top of the infant in the car seat. Fortunately, it was light beer.

    Baby

    What’s the difference between a dumpster full of dead babies and a Lamborghini?

    I don’t have a Lamborghini in my garage.

    Difference

    I made a website for orphans. It doesn’t have a home page.

    What’s the difference between a Lamborghini and a dead body? I don’t have a Lamborghini in my garage.

    What is the difference between Iron Man and Iron Woman? One is a superhero and the other is a simple command.

    Lambo

    What's the difference between a Lambo and a pile of dead babies?

    I don't have a Lambo in my garage.

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  • Rap

    Did you hear about Paul Walker's rap?

    Wrapped around that tree.

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  • Cash

    I just came across a pile of cash in the parking lot.

    Usually I just use tissues.

    Family

    What did Dom Toretto say about the tree Paul Walker hit?

    "Family strong, but not that strong."

    Baby

    How do you take care of all the babies you just crushed with your car?

    Open a pizza shop 🍕

    Dandruff

    Did you know Paul Walker had dandruff? Neither did I til I seen his Head and Shoulders on the dashboard.

    Cat

    What did the cat say when he took his new car for a test drive?

    "Meoooow!"

    Dandruff

    Did you know Princess Diana had dandruff?

    Yea, they found her “head and shoulders“ on the backseat of her car.