My favorite thing to do on my free time is putting a large skewer on the front of my car and speeding through a school zone trying to make a kebab.
Seat belts are like the condom for cars.
What did the car say when it crashed? Thats Wheely unfortunate.
A physicist, an engineer and a programmer were in a car driving over a steep alpine pass when the brakes failed. The car was getting faster and faster, they were struggling to get round the corners and once or twice only the feeble crash barrier saved them from crashing down the side of the mountain. They were sure they were all going to die, when suddenly they spotted an escape lane. They pulled into the escape lane, and came safely to a halt.
The physicist said, "We need to model the friction in the brake pads and the resultant temperature rise, see if we can work out why they failed."
The engineer said, "I think I've got a few spanners in the back. I'll take a look and see if I can work out what's wrong."
The programmer said, "Why don't we get going again and see if it's reproducible?"
how does an indian open his car
boot boot (in an indian accent)
What's the difference between a Lamourghini and a hostage? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.
Three doctors go into a room to get rid of a dead guys body they notice when they walk over he has a boner the first doctor decides why not fuck him he still has a boner left in him the 2nd says well he's dead and I I'm a virgin the 3d one says I can't I'm on my period and then says okey why not he already dead it's not like he doesn't smell bad after all that they go to walk out and the guy pops up and says thanks for saveing my life pumping blood back into my body...........
A Pedophile pulls up to little Jonny, lowers his window and asks, “hey little boy, if I give you a Lolly will you come in my car?” Little Jonny, “give me the whole packet and I’ll come in your mouth”
what did the grim reaper say when his favorite car commercial came on? Safe life repair, safe life replace!
What is your car 🚙 you can not drive ? A super flying car 🚘
How do you get 500 dead baby’s into a car? A blender
How do you get 500 dead baby’s out of a car? A straw
twinkle, twinkle little star. I hope i'll get hit by a car. am not dead yet, i hope i'll die. I hope i'll born to a new hole life.
my blind friend got ran over ............ by a parked car
Why did the elephant cross the road? It didn't see the cars.
There were three men in a car, the driver, a homeless man, and a rapper. The driver takes the to the woods and says, "I'm not really a cab driver, I'm a wanted killer". The homeless man says"I'm not really homeless" and pulls out a chain. The rapper says, "If we're gonna be completely honest, I'm not a rapper, i'm a cop''
If a person in a wheel car runs you over, can you call it a Hit and Can ́t Run
All the traffic stoping the cars, how do you spell that without any R’s.
THAT
a guy crashed his ford suv he couldnt ESCAPE.
What did the mechanic say to the other mechanic when he broke the car? "How will we wrench ourselves out of this?"
I almost got run over by a car For the rest of the day I was Taking the backseat as I was wheely Tried
