Cancer jokes
My parents were concerned when I said I like to bleed, but at least I cut my risk of cancer and stroke in half.
What did the girl get for Christmas?
Cancer.
Friend: Ur sister after you were born. 😭
Me: Ur brother after chemotherapy. 😵
A kid with hallucinations and cancer is on a Jeopardy game show.
"What's behind curtain #1... YOU HAVE WON..... CANCER!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Carys’s mum has chemo.
NO PAPERS CAN CHANGE MY FUTURE!
Every zodiac sign has a different hairstyle except Cancer.
My grandma always told my dad if a bird ever got in your house/truck, someone would die later that exact day.
She found out she had cancer. 11 months later, my grandpa died of a stroke. I hope to see them in heaven. I’d like to meet them. Pls comment good things. I really, really love them, even though I didn’t get to meet them. 😭😭😭
Stop making jokes about cancer... I might sound like a Karen, but it’s not fair... My mum died of cancer last month, and still I cry nearly every night 🙏🏻
Once upon a time, Bob was in his hospital bed, receiving medical treatment not that far after finding out he had cancer. One day, his friend Jeremy decided to visit him. Jeremy told his best buddy this very inspiring sentence: "Sometimes in life, you and your heart will climb tall peaking mountains, and low flat valleys, and all after that we'll be happy forever in heaven, eventually." Little did Bob know that Jeremy was talking about his heart monitor.
My Friend: Why does Santa look like that?
My 15 Year Old Friend: He has secateurs cancer...
Me: I heard it's because he comes once a year.
*Everyone Looks at me*
I would go suck some titties, but I’d rather die from being shot than cancer.
What’s the difference between a cancer patient and a British news reporter in the South?
They usually don’t live to tell the tale.
A player in Baldi's Basics says, "Why are you bald?"
Baldi responds, "Well, I have cancer."
The player says, "Oh, good for you!"
If you have cancer, you are gay.
What do you call an overly clingy child?
A tumor.
Son: Mom, I did the test and I have cancer!
Mom: YOU HAVE CANCER?!
Son: Mom, as my zodiac symbol...
Mom:....
My mother said I'm sexy. I said no, I have cancer.
Some people put zodiacs on everything.
They said they couldn’t go to the party because of cancer.
What's the difference between milk and a cancer patient?
There's none, they both don't age well.
Why does Ella have cancer?
Because she’s stupid.