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Call jokes

Orphan

Teacher: What do you kids want to be when you grow up?

Kid 1: I want to be a firefighter.

Kid 2: I want to be a police officer.

Kid 3: I want to be dead like both my parents.

Teacher: Ok, everyone pull out your books.

Kid 4: Are we going to ignore what he said?

Teacher: What do you want me to do? Call his parents?

Orphan

What do you call an orphan with parents?

Idk, I never met one before.

Bonus joke: I went up to an orphan and asked where his parents were. He said, "I don’t have any." I said, "Wonder why."

Another bonus joke: Me: Hey. Orphan: Hey. Me: What do you do for fun? Orphan: Look for my parents. Me: Me, so they're not dead? Orphan: No, they just abandoned me.

More bonus: What do you call a homeless kid?

An orphan.

Last bonus: Why don’t orphanages teach kids about home?

Because they can’t find one.

lmao this is so funny, dark humor can be funny. Sorry, orphans!

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  • Nun

    A sad guy called "nun" is crying next to the grave of his best friend called "month". "Month" got killed by a gay guy, and after that, "nun" got homophobic.

    While "nun" is sitting next to "month"'s grave, he heard a guy ask his friend: 《Do You Wanna Play A Game On?》 "Nun" got angry and he asked that guy: 《What did you just say to your friend?》 The guy answers: 《A game on, why?》

    "Nun" kills the two guys.

    🤔

    Memes

    Misunderstanding

    One day, I'm going to Malta to a big hotel. In the morning, I go down to eat breakfast. I tell the waitress I want two pieces of toast. She brings me only one piece. I tell her I want a piece. She says, "Go to the toilet." I say, "You don't understand. I want a piece on my plate." She says, "You better not piss on your plate, you son of a bitch." I don't even know the lady, and she calls me a son of a bitch.

    I don't need this shit!!

    Later, I go to eat at the big restaurant. The waitress brings me a spoon and a knife, but no fork. I tell her I wanted a fork. She tells me everyone wanna fuck. I say, "You don't understand, I want a fork on my table." She says, "You better not fuck on the table, you son of a bitch." I don't even know the lady, and she calls me a son of a bitch.

    I don't need this shit!

    So, I go back to my room in a hotel, and there are no sheets on the bed. I call the manager and tell him I want a sheet. He tells me, go to the toilet. I say, "You don't understand, I want a sheet on my bed." He says, "You better not shit on my bed, you son of a bitch."

    I go to the checkout, and the man at the desk says, 'Peace on you.' I say, 'Piss on you too, you son of a bitch. I'm going back to Italia. Arrivederci!'

    I don't need this shit!

    Moral of the story, don't go to Australia with a Korean accent.

    Baseball

    Few jokes (sorry if they have already been used).

    1 I couldn't figure out why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.

    2 Why does Humpty Dumpty love autumn? Because he always has a great fall.

    3 Have you heard the one about the skunk? Never mind, it really stinks.

    4 It's always windy in a sports arena. All those fans.

    5 What is the best day to go to the beach? Sunday, of course!

    6 Comic Sans walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve your type here."

    7 What's the easiest way to get straight As? Use a ruler.

    8 Why were they called the Dark Ages? Because there were lots of knights.

    Gang

    What do you call it when you see Chinese people in a gang?

    The "Ching Chang Gang."

    Massage

    What do you call gay men receiving anonymous blowjobs at the glory holes inside an adult bookstore?

    Norwegian massage.

    Cow

    Four cows went to the county fair. They saw a sign that said that next year animals can enter a singing contest. They decided that they would enter next year. So they called their group the "4 Cs Quartet" since their names were Clementine, Candy, Cookie, and Columbine.

    They discovered how they could win. After a discussion, they decided to eat as much corn as possible, so they would sing in perfect 4 part hominy.

    Boner

    Teacher: *calls you up to the board*. You: Ok. *Gets intense boner* *has to fart really bad* You: F***!!!!!!!

    Priest

    What do you call a cross between a priest and a child?

    The cross shoved up the priest’s ass as he ‘downward dogs’ the kid.

    Blanket

    Why did Michael Jackson name his kid Blanket?

    What would you call a cover for your cock?

    Wife

    Wife: I will leave you if you call me fat again.

    Husband: Wait, dear... Don’t do it for the sake of our kid!

    Wife: Kid?

    Husband: Yeah, aren’t you pregnant?

    Gay

    To all my bullies: don’t call me gay because I’m not happy.