Call jokes
What does a cannibal call a wheelchair user? A Drive-Thru.
What do you call an atheist bone? -- A blasfemur.
What does an Asian call a penis? A wong.
What does an Asian do with its legs? It wok.
What do you call an avocado that got shot? Glockamole.
So, there was a kid named Bobby, and he was writing notes. He asked his mother, who was on a phone call, "what is one plus one?" She said, "I HATE YOU." Then he asked his brother what is 2 + 2, who was watching a Batman movie, said, "NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU BATMAN!" Then he asked his dad what is 4 plus 4, who was playing football, said, "85 SMACK EM DOWN!" Then he asked his sister 8+8, (she was playing with barbies), and she said, "My buns are burning." Then he went to school and told her teacher the first note he wrote down. The teacher sent him to the principal’s office. The principal yelled, "WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?!" Bobby said, "NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU BATMAN!" The principal yelled, "HOW MANY SPANKINGS DO YOU WANT?!" Then he said, "85 SMACK EM DOWN!" Then he walked away from the principal’s office and said, "my buns are burning."
What’s Whitney Houston’s favorite type of coordination? HAAAAND EEEEEEEEEYYYYEEE!
What’s better than Ted Danson? Ted singing and Danson!
What did the drummer call his twin daughters? Anna one, Anna two!
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don’t know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day!
What does a nosey pepper do? It gets jalapeño business!
Calling you an idiot would be an insult to stupid people. You're much worse than that.
What is it called when the gynecologist slanders your grandfather?
A pap smear.
I called the suicide hotline, and he suggested I draw on myself to distract myself.
I replied I'd get ink poisoning.
Wouldn't recommend, the police came.
What do you call 2 homeless people throwing rocks at each other? "Pillow Fight!"
The flower made a phone call and became cauliflower.
What do you call a surprised Asian?
Ho Lee Fuc.
What do you call my brother in the water?
"Tsunami."
What do you call a Chinese baby?
Sum Ting Wong.
What do you call a lesbian vampire?
Cunt Dracula.
What would you call a person who hides in a house for 24 hours and then kills them?
Morgz.
What do you call a terrorist in a wheelchair?
An RC-XD.
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?
Special Forces.
What do you call a school bus that you cannot drive?
A friend.
Why was the beach salty? Because the land didn't wave back. The ocean then called the land a beach.