Call jokes
What do you call an autistic kid with a glock?
Special forces.
Btw, I'm 13.
What do you call a female octopus? An octopussy.
Patient: “Doctor, my bottom hurts.”
Doctor: “Can you tell me exactly where it hurts?”
Patient: “Right around the entrance.”
Doctor: “As long as you call it the entrance, it will hurt.”
What do you call an Indian going through the bins?
RUM-MAJINGG
Well, if someone ever calls you gay 🌈🏳️🌈, just say, "Well, at least I'm straighter than the pole your mommy dances on." 🤣🖕
So, I went up to an Australian girl. She looked like she was 20, and I said, "Can I have your phone number, sweetheart?" She said, "696969." I said, "Oh, haha, okay." A few days later, her mother called me and said she's 15.
What do you call a group of depressed kids?
The suicide squad.
Why does new pavement smell like butt?
In other words you can also call it asphalt.
Ass-phalt.
What do you call expired milk?
The Milky Way.
What do you call Cap and Spider-Man? Spider-America!
In Home Alone, if the kid was an orphan, it would just be called "Alone."
My name is Devonair.
When I get a haircut, it's always bald.
Kids make fun of me, they call me "dang-near bald head."
My name is Devonair *dev-on-near*
I always thought they were making fun of me because of my name pronounced near.
What do you call a blind person on a date? A blind date.
What do you call a can opener that doesn’t work?
A can’t opener!
What do you call a Hippie's Wife? A Mississippi.
What do you call a blind dinosaur? Do-you-think-he-saurus.
What do you call a wild cow in a shop with old things?
A bull in a china shop.
What do you call a dwarf police officer?
A guinea pig.
What do you call a hippo that has been thrown in a pan?
Hippo-POT-amus!
What do kids call a balanced meal?
A hamburger in each hand! XD XD XD XD