Break

Break jokes

Why does a robot malfunction when they get sad?

Because they have a break down.

John Wilkes Booth, to his fiancee: "I have an important role to play tonight at Ford's Theater."

Fiancee: "Break a leg!"

How do you break up blind people in a fight? Scream, "I put my money on the guy with the knife!"

Throw a plate.

It’s broken, right?

Say “sorry” to it.

Did it fix back?

No... that’s the same thing you did to me :)

All-star gay mix

Somebody once told me The world is gonna rape me The dick's the hardest part of the body She looked like she's having fun With her finger and her thumb In the shape of an "L" in her bumhole.

Well, I started cumming And she started cumming Fed with dick, she's in love with bumming Didn't make sense not to live for bum Your dick gets hard, but your ass gets numb.

So much to fuck, so much to suck So what's wrong with eating the asshole? You'll never know if you don't try You'll never taste if you don't lick.

Hey now, you're a porn star Get your sex on, bum pain Hey now, you're a porn star Suck a schlong, ass frail And all that glitters is cum Only sperm heads break the female egg.

It's a gay place and they say it gets gayer You're licking bum now, wait 'til your a bit older But the bent boys beg to differ Judging by the hole in the homeless man's throat.

The sperm in the bath is getting pretty thin The sperms getting warm so you might as well swim My world's on cocaine, how about yours? That's the way I like it and I never get raped!

Hey now, you're a porn star Get your sex on, bum pain Hey now, you're a porn star Suck a willy, ass frale And all that glitters is cum Only sperm heads break the female egg.

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    • What commitment does a pimp make to each new hoe he turns out?

    Answer: He will always be there for her after the break-in period.

    My girlfriend broke up with me this morning, and we just started dating yesterday.

    Now she's having a breakfast.

    Well, I didn’t get as high as I wanted to, but I’m high enough that if I fall I’d probably break something.

    Sticks and stones may break my bones, but a crowbar could do it so much quicker.

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    • Why did the ocean break up with the pond?

    Because the pond was too shallow.

    Never break someone's heart, they only have one. Break their bones instead, they have 206 of them.

    Why did the skeleton have no friends?

    He was a boner!

    Heheheh!

    Ah, see ya soon kiddo.

    I'm going on break.

    I'll give you some fried snow later!

    It was pornography class, and there was a break.

    Two adults were "having a good time" till the teacher says...

    Teacher: Hey! SAY ALL THE NUMBERS TO 10,000 NOW!

    Adult 1: How about I say my ABC's?

    Teacher: Go ahead, I guess...

    Adult 1: A B C E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

    Teacher: Where's the D?

    Adult 2: Inside me...

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    • My boyfriend thinks he’s hilarious.

    Him: How do you break things?

    Me: You break things up.

    Him: Okay.

    Me: Is everything okay?

    Him: We’re a twig. We’re breaking up.

    I got so bad about cutting myself every time I went to the bathroom, I wanted to break my jacket zipper off and use that!

    One day, little Johnny and little Susan were in bible class. Little Susan had been tired that day, so she kept falling asleep. The teacher said to little Susan, "Who is our Lord and Savior?" Little Johnny poked her in the butt with a push pin, and she yelled, "Jesus Christ!" The teacher goes, "That's right, go back to bed." Then, the next thing the teacher asked was, "Who gave up their son for our sins?" Little Johnny poked her again, and she yelled, "God Almighty!" The teacher says, "That's right, go back to bed." The next question the teacher asked was, "What did Adam say to Eve after their 13th child?" Little Johnny poked her in the butt again. She yelled, "If you stick that thing in me again, I am going to break it in half and shove it up your own ass and see how you like it!"

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