Question: Why did the blonde get excited after finishing a puzzle in 5 months?
Answer: The box said 3-5 years!
What do you call a lesbian with braces? A box cutter.
Little Johnny attends school regularly and often brings a box of sultanas as a gift to his favorite teacher.
One morning Little Johnny attends class without a box of sultanas.
The teacher enquires, why Johnny "where is my box of sultanas?"
Johnny replied, "Sorry, miss, my rabbit died."
How did Princess Diana die?
Giving the glove box head.
Abortion is becoming more and more expensive these days. So visit Ammu-nation and pick up an Armsan RS-X1 tactical shotgun. It comes with a free box of ammo and a three year warranty. Buy now, pay later.
When your brother sends you to go get a box of condoms for his b-day. (* *)
Why is a gun like a box of chocolates?
If you pull one out in class, everyone wants to be your friend.
How many children can you fit in a box?
Maybe five if you have a trash compactor.
Yo momma is so stupid, she eats cardboard boxes thinking they're chocolate bars.
What do a brand new house, me, and new jewelry box have in common?
We're all empty on the inside.
Q: What is a box's favorite sport?
A: Box-ketball.
The Pope drives around in a glass box, or as I like to call him, a sniper's dream.
What do an X-Box and Michael Jackson have in common? They're both made of plastic and little kids turn them on.
How do you get 50 hungry kids into a box? You put a can of beans in there.
How do you get 50 hungry kids out of a box? You run past with a can opener.
Yo mama's such a milf, she deserves a tongue punch in the fart box.
Two boys came home for dinner late, and their mother asked, "Where have you boys been?" One of them replied with, "We were all over the neighborhood, we're mailmen now." Their snobby teen sister said, "Well, you're not real mailmen, real mailmen use real letters." Then one of the boys said, "Actually, we used real letters, we found a whole box of them under your bed."
Children are like a box of Christmas decorations. I keep them in my basement until it’s time to hang them from a tree.
I was at a supermarket in Barcelona and I noticed the alarm had gone off. There was a thief at the store; the tea bag section had been ransacked.
Luckily they found the thief, Pionel Pessi, with boxes of his favourite tea, Penaltea. Shame on you, Pessi!
My son and I went on a tour to the Old Trafford Stadium. We were admiring the 76,000 seat arena when he suddenly pointed at the pitch.
“Dad, who is that man camping there?” I said, “Son, that is Bruno Penandes. He lives in that Penalty box. He only performs in small games.”
What do you get when you put a baby in a box filled with glass and nails and push it down the stairs?
... A boner.
