Puns

Anonymous

If you were on the titanic and you didn’t leave the ship what would you do? Just let that sink in

Puns

Anonymous

Q: Why do Norwegian ships have bar codes on them?

A: So when they come into port they can Scan-Da-Navy-In!

Legs

BigDickBobby

A man is walking on the deck of a cruise ship, when he sees a woman, without arms and legs, crying. The man says “What’s wrong?” The woman says “I’ve never been hugged before.” So, the man gives her a hug and walks away.

The next day, the man sees the woman, on the deck, crying again. The man says “What’s wrong, now?” The woman says “I’ve never been kissed before.” So, the man gives her a kiss and walks away.

The next day, the same thing occurs. The man says “Oh, for Christ’s sake! What’s wrong, this time?!” The woman says “Well, I’ve never been fucked before.” So, the man picks her up, throws her into the ocean, and yells “YOU’RE FUCKED!”

Nut

5

A pirate walked into a bar with his ship’s steering wheel hanging off his pants. The bartender says, “Hey! What’s with the steering wheel?” The pirate says, “I don’t know but it’s driving me nuts!”

Return

Pistacio

Why does the Norway navy have barcodes on the sides of their ships?

So when they return to port, they can Scandinavian

Communist

Anonymous

What do you call a communist pirate ship?

The USS Arrrrr.

Fat

Anonymous

Your mamma’s so fat the aliens call her their mother ship

Nut

Anonymous

A pirate walks into a bar and has a ship’s wheel in his pants. The bartender asks, “What’s with the wheel in your pants?” The pirate replies, “Yarrr! It’s drivin’ me nuts!”

America

Anonymous

“Why do people call Americans excessive?”

“It was probably because of WWII.”

“Oh you mean the war where America responded to the destruction of several ships and a harbor and the deaths of little over a thousand by completely flattening two cities and killing hundreds of thousands of people?”

Scan

YEET

why do they put barcodes on the ships in norway why? so when they come into port they can scan-de-navian

Poor

From the best to Poor

When you going to titanic: Its a the best ship at world When you know its sinking: Its the poor ship!

Titanic

Samuel j. Carvajal

The titanic was going through the ocean. Chuck Norris was on the ship and they never crashed into an iceberg, he just shat off the front of the ship

Nut

Anonymous

A pirate walked into a pub with a ship wheel attached to his balls. The bartender says “what the hell is that?”. The pirate said “I don’t know but it’s driving me nuts!”.

Light

theindianguy

how can you light up a candle in a ship which does not contain any instrument and you are alone with just a packet of candles? ans:just throw one candle in sea the boat will become lighter

Means

USSR Soldier

I was talking to a close friend that was Islamic.

He said he was being shipped to an amazing training.

I asked “where are you going”

He said “Camp Bin Laden”

I asked “what do they do there”

He answered “they got bomb training and hand to hand combat training. Plus the got arts and crafts.”

I asked “what do you mean by arts and crafts?”

He said “see this towel on my head” I nodded “I made it out of boxer jokes”

Blue

Anonymous

If, Joey Deacon made his own company, it would be called The Joey Deacon Company; Walt Disney should have a run for its money. P.S… The Joey Deacon Pictures logo would have some autistic people making noises to ‘When You Wish Upon A Window’, with the castle being the Blue Peter ship, instead.

Titanic

USSR Soldier

You know how many people said “this ship will never sink”?

They jinxed it by saying “never sink”

War

Anonymous

Why did hitler lose the war ?

Because göring ate every last airplanes , tanks , artilleries , ships and ammunitions

Orphan

Anonymous

Why can’t orphans be a space ship because they don’t have a mothership😝😝😝🤪.

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