Body jokes
You're so fat that I run around you for exercise.
What's worse than sucking a dozen raw oysters out of your grandmother's cunt?
Putting in 12 and sucking out 13.
What do skeletons do with their organs?
They organize them!
I was trying to make homemade baby powder until I realized it isn't made from babies, oops wrong ingredient... smh
What do you call my dick?
A. A monster.
What's the artist imagine something?
Imagine Dragons!
Imagine draggin' these nuts across your face!
Roses are red, grass is greener.
When I think of you, I play with my weiner.
Q: How do you get a one armed person out of a tree?
A: You wave at them.
Why do midgets laugh when they run?
Because the grass is tickling their ballsacks!
Oh, my fat joke offended you? Which one of your chins did I hurt?
Why did the nose cross the road to find the person who "nose"?
Why did the midget laugh when he ran? Because the grass tickles his balls.
What did the left butt cheek say to the right butt cheek? "Together we can stop this shit!"
What did the poo say when it fell out of your bum?
"Your anus looks like my mum's bedsheet which is smelly and covered in poo."
I also just wanted to add that a Goonie's anus looks like my nan's mouth.
I asked my doctor if it was normal for one of my nuts to be bigger than the other two.
What do you call a cannibal without any eyes? A cann-bal :)
My friend asked me:
Friend: "How much is your body worth?"
Me: "1 million."
Friend: "1 million dollars?!"
Me: "No. 1 million kilograms."
Friend: "Oh."
Your mama's breath smells so bad, people can't wait for her to fart.
A girl looked in the fridge. She got mad that somebody ate the last ice cream cone. She ran into her sister's room and said, "This is why you're fat!" Then fell down the stairs. Good thing she had that belly roll to save her.
Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.