Body jokes
So, if being a paedophile is a career, then burying the bodies must be gardening.
What did the butt say to the other butt? "I got big fat apples for butt checks!"
Why did the skeleton never get cold? Because it went right through him!
What's the difference between a mole and a priest?
One will till your 13 to put hairs on your face.
Why did the fire not burn the kid? Because it had no lips.
What kind of chair inhabits your soul?
A hair!
A girl looked in the fridge. She got mad that somebody ate the last ice cream cone. She ran into her sister's room and said, "This is why you're fat!" Then fell down the stairs. Good thing she had that belly roll to save her.
I work at a morgue and we wrap the bodies in bubble wrap.
I was working the night shift and just looking at the security cameras, but then I heard popping behind me!
What's the difference between my basement and my garage?
One has a pile of babies' bodies; the other has their heads.
Y’all can actually see them at all, my toe.
Why can’t kids with cancer have anal sex?
Because they have cancer.
I think my penis has facial recognition.
Can you believe they're still together after everything they've been through?
Who you might ask...
YOUR ASS CHEEKS!
What do you call your sister if she only has one leg?
Ei-lean.
Why did Susie fall off the swing?
Because she had no arms.
"Knock knock."
"Who's there?"
"Not Susie!"
What is long and not hairy?
The conga line in the cancer department.
Everyone has cracks in them, mine's just in my heart and not my ass.
Yo momma so skinny, she wipes with floss!
Your momma is so skinny, she hula hoops with a Cheerio!
Somebody stole my joke.
So I stole their spinal cord.