Black jokes
What's black and grey and red all over?
A dead r******.
What’s a nut’s favorite scary movie?
The Creature from the Black Legume.
My friend is an emo. I asked why he wears black. He said, "Black like my soul." I just walked away.
Gays, blacks, and your maw, mate.
What's white but not black, and red all over?
J. K. Rowling after attending the world premiere of the next Matrix movie.
Q: What's black and white and red all over?
A: The U.S. in 1919!
My science teacher asked me what is found inside cells.
I guess "blacks" wasn't the right answer.
What do you call a black couple who's on welfare and food stamps?
Lay-Z and Freeyonce
I'm Black, when a cop sees me, he shoots.
Why was the chicken black and the other were white? Adoption!
"Black midget porn is in 911."
Donald Trump is to white Americans as O.J. Simpson is to black Americans. They will never choose to convict these people even if they murdered or raped.
How do you know if a black lady’s pregnant?
You put a banana up her vagina and see if any little monkeys come and get it.
In a world of feline folly, There lived a cat with a secret, A taste for adventure and mischief, And a love for KFC's golden treat.
With eyes like emerald jewels, And fur as black as night, This feline prowled the streets, In search of a savory delight.
Oh, how it yearned for chicken, Crispy and finger-lickin' good, But the cat knew it had to be sly, To satisfy its craving like it should.
Through alleyways it stealthily tiptoed, With nimble paws and a stealthy glide, Until it stumbled upon a secret, That made its hunger amplified.
A stash of KFC's golden eggs, Hidden away from prying eyes, An accidental treasure trove, A feast fit for a feline paradise.
With each stolen egg devoured, The cat's satisfaction grew, The taste of crispy breading, And juicy chicken, it knew.
Word soon spread of this food bandit, A legend of a cat so bold, Whispers echoed through the town, Of the one who stole the KFC gold.
But the cat with the KFC get eggs, Remained a mystery to all, A phantom of the night it became, Leaving no trace, no trail to recall.
And so, it continues its nightly quest, For chicken that satisfies its soul, The cat with the KFC get eggs, Forever on the prowl, never to be controlled.
What do you call a black man flying a plane?
A pilot, you racist bastard!
Hang in there, ya emo bastards! Remember, you could always be dead. Oh, too soon?
No wonder they wanna die so much. I'd wanna die too if I was a freak who listens to Black Veil Brides!
Anybody got a knife? I mean, an emo dildo?
Why should you fear white people in prison instead of the blacks?
Because you know that whites are in for actually committing something.
This black dude goes up to an Indian guy and says, "What up brotha?"
The Indian guy gets offended and says, "We are not the same."
The black guy then pulls out a gun, and the Indian guy says, "Ok brother, ok brother, we are the same, we are the same."
Do the voice in your head.
What do you call a person who keeps making jokes about rappers?
An annoying prick whose black dad left him as a kid.
Rapboat steals more rhymes than black people steal cars.