Black jokes
What did the black kid say when he went to the confession booth?
"Daddy?"
Three girls were lined up for execution. The black-haired one, being the smart one, turned around and yelled, "Tornado!"
Everyone panicked, and she escaped. The red-headed one, following her example, shouted as the executioners got back, "Hurricane!"
The red-headed friend escaped too. Now, it was the blonde's turn. Following both her friends, she turned to the executioners and yelled:
"Fire!"
How did black people learn to steal sports cars?
By playing GTA nonstop.
What do hockey players and cops have in common?
They both use sticks to hit something black.
A small, nervous woman steps into a hotel elevator in Las Vegas.
At the next floor, three large, burly men step in. The woman is immediately intimidated and clutches her purse tightly.
Suddenly, one of the men says in a deep voice: "Hit the floor!"
Terrified that she is about to be robbed, the woman drops her bags and collapses face down onto the floor of the elevator, cowering in fear.
The men burst out laughing and help the bewildered woman up. The speaker apologizes profusely and says: "No, ma'am, I meant hit the button for our floor!"
The next morning, the woman receives a massive bouquet of roses and has her entire hotel bill paid for. Attached is a note that says: "Thanks for the best laugh I've had in years."
Why don't black lives matter anymore?
Because a harvester is more efficient at picking crops than slaves.
My best friend is black. It really pissed me off when my mom sold him.
Yo mama is so black that she has her own solar system.
What do Jews and Black people have in common?
Living off welfare checks.
What do Arby's and black women have in common? They both have the meats.
What do you call an older white man surrounded by young black men in the 1800s?
Master.
What do you call an older white man surrounded by young black men in the 2000s?
Coach.
Why did they invent white chocolate?
So Black people can be messy too.
Why are Black people afraid of ghosts?
Because ghosts remind them of the KKK.
My science teacher asked me what is found inside cells.
I guess "blacks" wasn't the right answer.
What do you call a black couple who's on welfare and food stamps?
Lay-Z and Freeyonce.
Black comedy name week:
Malt liquor Monday Tupac Tuesday Watermelon Wednesday Thong Thursday Fried chicken Friday Sukie Sukie Saturday Slap a hoe Sunday
What do black lesbians say about pussy?
"Smells like chicken, tastes like chicken."
What’s black and white and red all over?
A Milano’s cherry.
What attracted Jeffrey Dahmer to abortion clinics?
- He smelled veal.
What did Jeffrey Dahmer do when done with his black dates?
He dumped them.