Belief jokes
If we're all God's children, what's so special about Jesus?
Cannibal eats missionary, gets a taste for religion.
Why don't Asian kids believe in Santa Claus?
Because they're the ones who made the toys.
Why do Jews have big noses?
Because air is free...
Why don't Chinese children believe in Santa?
Because they're the ones making the toys.
My gay ass: I want to find Jesus.
Religious mom: FINALLY!
Me: Grabs a noose.
Why did the orphan go to church?
Because they need a father.
Why do orphans love to go to church? Because they have someone to call father.
I don’t understand why Christians are so against body piercings. Didn’t Jesus have four?
Why do nuns not wear bras?
God supports everything.
God, I love telling children their parents love them, but only on April Fools'. They're orphans, after all.
"Amen, "Amen," "Amen."
Hail Satan.
............
Oh, sorry. I forgot which religion I was pretending to respect.
Whats the difference between NASA and religion
NASA takes you through space Religion takes you through two towers
What movie do atheists watch for Christmas?
"Coincidence on 34th Street."
Why don't Chinese people believe in Santa? Cause they make the toys.
Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Heaven.
Heaven who?
Heaven fun over there?
I used to believe everything in the Bible until I read about the Jew giving out the free fish.
You know it's so hard to clean my sex toys.
Thank you, Jesus, for creating holy water!
How do you anger a white Christian nationalist?
Tell him the truth.
Why that Nun didn't like Virgin Mary?
Because she was straight into Jesus.