God died for your sins, so basically if you don't sin then Jesus died for nothing.
Men and women are not equal, speaking biologically and mentally. I don't care what other feminists say. Men are naturally physically stronger, while women are more mentally stable (sometimes). The internet and the media will lie. You feminists say that you are stronger. Well, you wish. You can't hit a girl because she is more sensitive, but she says she is stronger. Like, what the hell?
We're not sexist men; you're sexist women. And BTW, you'll rot in hell for hating God's creation. And also, men were created before women. Search it up in the Bible or online.
Stephen Hawking said there is no god. God said there is no Stephen Hawking
I believe Alia is a true god because they say in the beginning there was an explosion.
I was in the corner shop to buy some lottery tickets, and the Indian woman was sporting a red dot on her forehead. I scratched it off and won a fucking Ford Focus!
Is that a person over there?
Na, it's Jesus.
What God do rats worship?
Cheesus.
I used to believe everything in the Bible until I read about the Jew giving out the free fish.
Everything is now so expensive in Africa that witches don’t serve food in dreams again. Am I lying? Okay, when last did you eat in your dreams?
I still remember my dad's last words: "Don't worry son, Allah will be pleased."
Going to church, you don't think you are Christian.
Sleeping with ten men, you don't think you are straight.
You would think catholic churches would be in favor of condoms: less DNA evidence.
I love going to church to get closer to God, but my least favorite part of church has to be touching the priest’s penis.
Scientists make skyscrapers and airplanes.
Religion crashes them.
The best way to tell a Hindu person and a Muslim person apart is asking them, "Are you 7-Eleven or 9/11?"
Jesus will be history when I realize he's behind me.
The only difference between you and Jesus, is that jesus believed in himself.
How can you tell an anti-vaccine kid?
It's only got 10 hours to live.
Do you know where priests go at night?
To all night sale at Boys R Us.
Why did the orphan cross the street? Because they thought that mommy and daddy was on the other side.
