Belief jokes
Stephen Hawking said there is no god.
God said there is no Stephen Hawking.
It's best not to say "Hail Satan" because he can't control the weather!
Scientists make skyscrapers and airplanes.
Religion crashes them.
What is the difference between a nun and a hooker?
One makes you believe in Heaven, the other makes you feel it.
I believe everything in the Bible until I read about the Jew giving out the free fish.
Jesus will be history when I realize he's behind me.
The only difference between you and Jesus is that Jesus believed in himself.
Going to church, you don't think you are Christian.
Sleeping with ten men, you don't think you are straight.
Why do orphans go to church?
So they have someone to call father.
You would think catholic churches would be in favor of condoms: less DNA evidence.
I still remember my dad's last words: "Don't worry son, Allah will be pleased."
I used to think that Jewish people were a myth.
But one day I realized, they Israel.
How can you tell an anti-vaccine kid?
It's only got 10 hours to live.
Why did you always see Michael Jackson wearing two white gloves?
Because masturbation is against Michael Jackson's religious beliefs.
Do you know where priests go at night?
To all night sale at Boys R Us.
Why did the orphan cross the street? Because they thought that mommy and daddy was on the other side.
Hello, this is Godlygirl26. I want to help people with their problems no matter what. There is nothing that God cannot do. I want y'all to know that God is with you, not any of those stone or wood "gods" but a true, loving, powerful God. DM this right here and I will answer. Hope I can help you! Love, Godlygirl26.
What do the initials BIBLE stand for?
"Bullshit In Book Lacking Evidence."
If you shit in a church, is it a holy shit?
Hi guys, I have a brain teaser for you! Leave it in the comment section if you figure it out. Here you go!
If you kill yourself (suicide which is technically murder), will you go to Heaven or Hell? Because you murdered yourself, but what if you were a Christian?
That was my brain teaser for you guys! Make sure you leave what you came up with for the answer in the comment section below!! PEACE OUT!!!! :)