Being jokes
Raping white women should be encouraged everywhere!
I'm going to open a wellness center for ASD kids to be able to express themselves through music and painting. I will call it Artism!
My uncle got sued from NASA the other day. He claimed to be the first one to enter Uranus.
My mom got a clown for my birthday, but it ended up being my sister. 🤡
Well, being an American is just a joke itself.
Why do orphans become criminals? To know what it’s like to be wanted.
Why are orphans bad at poker? They don’t know what a full house is.
I saw a child crying yesterday, so I asked him where his parents were. Bad move. I got fired from my job at the orphanage.
What do you call an orphan’s family reunion? Me time.
Did you know? The letter ‘f’ in orphan stands for family.
What is an orphan’s least favorite song? We Are Family.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite TV show? Family Guy.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite movie? Meet the Parents.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite type of music? House.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite store? Home Depot.
What’s an orphan’s favorite band? Foster the People.
What do you call a virgin from Alabama? An orphan.
Where do orphan chickens end up? Foster Farms.
What beer do orphans drink? Foster’s.
Why do orphans have water with their cereal? Because their dad never came back with the milk.
What do you call a fish with no parents? An orfin.
Why do orphans like playing tennis? Because it’s the only love they get.
Me: Are you an orphan? Orphan: Yes, what gave me away? Me: Your parents.
A bus full of nuns falls off a cliff and they all die. They arrive at the gates of heaven and meet St. Peter. St. Peter says to them, “Sisters, welcome to Heaven. In a moment I will let you all through the pearly gates, but before I may do that, I must ask each of you a single question.”
St. Peter turns to the first nun in the line and asks her, “Sister, have you ever touched a penis?” The Sister responds, “Well... there was this one time... that I kinda sorta... touched one with the tip of my pinky finger...” St. Peter says, “Alright Sister, now dip the tip of your pinky finger in the Holy Water, and you may be admitted.” and she did so.
St. Peter now turns to the second nun and says, “Sister, have you ever touched a penis?” “Well.... There was this one time... that I held one for a moment...” “Alright Sister, now just wash your hands in the Holy Water, and you may be admitted” and she does so.
Now at this, there is a noise, a jostling in the line. It seems that one nun is trying to cut in front of another! St. Peter sees this and asks the Nun, “Sister Susan, what is this? There is no rush!” Sister Susan responds, “Well if I’m going to have to gargle this stuff, I’d rather do it before Sister Mary sticks her ass in it!”
Why did the students eat their homework?
Because the teacher said it would be a piece of cake! 🎂😂
Hardest part about being a paedophile?
Fitting in.
I've thought about suicide, but there's always been a part of me that knows I wouldn't be able to live with the decision.
109 countries can't be wrong. Watch Europa: The Last Battle.
There are a lot of upsides to being an orphan.
For one, you never have to worry about your jokes being family friendly.
I would never slap a woman, then I’d be destroying property.
What do genders and the Twin Towers have in common? There used to be 2, but now they're a sensitive topic...
If an emo doesn't get better by Christmas, Santa's reindeer won't be the only thing jumping off roofs this year.
What’s the hardest part about being a pedophile?
Fitting in.
Has Covid-19 forced you to wear glasses and a mask at the same time?
You may be entitled to condensation.
Na, don't be mean to fat people. Oh wait, never mind, they can handle the weight.
Bligitty blot, bliggity blit,
You better not be talkin' shit. 🔫
Why do orphans become criminals? To know what it’s like to be wanted.