Being jokes

I used to be addicted to the hokey pokey, but then I turned myself around.

What are two plus sides to being an orphan?

1. All your snacks are family sized.

2. No one can make jokes about your mama.

Why do orphans play GTA? Because they can’t be wanted.

I asked my friend how long I can be in the sky. He said if you are emo, then forever.

I would go suck some titties, but I’d rather die from being shot than cancer.

What do Nemo and Emily's dad have in common? They both can't be found.

Autoerotic asphyxiation because hanging in there can be hard.

Why can’t orphans be gay?

Because they have no one to call daddy.

My grandma was telling me to be positive, as I was going in for an AIDS test.

Gather 6 friends to play Russian roulette, and one's mind will be blown away.

What would happen if a dam broke when you are on it?

You would be dam unlucky.

Why do orphans play GTA so much?

Because they can be wanted for once.

Why do orphans commit crimes?

To be wanted.

Why does a straight guy act gay? Because he wants to feel wanted and wants to be BFFs with the hottest girls.

Yo mama so fat when she step on a scale it say, "To be continued..."

My ceiling fan isn't the only thing that's going to be hanging tonight.

Why did the M&M go to school?

Because it wanted to be a Smartie!

Why do sisters have to be in a relationship? Because you don’t have to worry about your car.

If Hitler was in a car doing his salute, he would be saying, "Take the third right."

Did you hear about the cemetery? I heard that people are dying to be there.