What's the difference between a cunnilinguist and a Ritz?
One is a snack cracker.
The other, a crack snacker.
Women, you're a marshmallow because you're white, squashy, and everyone sticks their stick inside you.
I have to say that Halloween is my favorite day...
Every time they see me, kids and mothers run away...
I don’t have a costume so please don’t reprimand...
When I open up the door, I’ve got my penis in my hand.
Yo mama so stupid, she shoved two AA batteries up her ass and started singing, "I’ve Got The Power!"
Little Johnny was at home and then he went to his grandma's house. He went there to cuss so he wouldn't get in trouble, and secretly, Grandma called his momma to come pick him up.
Momma asked what Little Johnny did, and she said he cussed and cussed and cussed. Granny had enough and called Mom again. Momma said Little Johnny was grounded for 2 weeks, and Little Johnny cussed some more. Now he grounded for 3 weeks.
What is the fastest thing in the world?
James Charles when he sees little boys.
Why did the autistic kid walk across a busy road?
He was chasing his mind and got hit by a car.
I kicked a goose, and I liked it!
💔 The Broken Family 💔 . Part 1
Girl: Mom, dad tried to have sex with me last night.
Mom: Are you serious?? (Shocked)
Girl: Yah. He said I must kiss him after he didn't want to let me go.
Mom: Am gonna kill ur dad (Angry)
Girl: Please mom, we still need him, who will buy use food and clothes. You don't have a job mom.
Mom: But what he did was wrong.
Girl: I know.
(SOUND OF A CAR COMING IN)
Mom: Is that ur dad.
Girl: Yes Mom
Comment Part 2
I saw a poor man and I gave him money, and he said, "Nope, I don't need money." So I gave him money, and he punched me for no reason.
Why did the emu cross the road? Because it was the chicken's day off. Yeah, I hate myself, man.
What da dog doin'?
My friend Andrew once told me that "weird is high and drunk at the same time."
Just saying this, but I hate how many little kids there are on this site, and when they post, they have the worst posts about "sex", so I'm just saying how they act immature.
Guys, please stop making fake accounts of me. It's not funny, and it's disrespectful of you, ok, bitch?
How can you tell a blonde likes you? She ducks you two nights in a row.
What do you call a very rude bird? A mockingbird.
I put a magnet in my butthole and made the teachers smell it.
Why did the chicken cross the road? Because why not?
Akeld: All I want to do is mess with Gwen!
Gwen: LEAVE ME ALONE!
Akeld: NOT EVER!
