Baby jokes
Why can't orphans play baseball? Because they don't know where home is...
Say, Aiden, are you and Gwen dating? Oooo, you and her sitting in a tree, K.I.S.S.I.N.G., then comes the romance, then comes engagement, then comes the wedding, and then the baby! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Then comes cheating and arguments, and then D.I.V.O.R.C.E.!!!!!!!!!!!!
Aiden + Gwen = Husband and wife! HAHAHAHAHAHA!
Girlfriend and boyfriend!!!!!!!!
A bomb is like a baby; when you drop it, everyone screams.
What's the difference between a baby and a brick?
A brick doesn't cry when you throw it on a wall.
What did Sophie Brussaux's baby get every week?
A face full of sperm.
Account for me too, baby👧! Is so cute together with game slot jokes.
What kind of ankle are you? A broken ankle.
What's the difference between a baby and a bowling ball?
A bowling ball doesn't cry when you put your fingers in it.
What's better than a pile of dead babies?
One that's alive in the middle that has to eat its way out.
What's cold, blue and makes women cry?
Cot death.
The bears came home. Daddy bear said, "Who's been eating my porridge?" said, "Who's been in my porch?" Baby bear said, "Never mind about the porridge, who knocked the telly?"
How do terrorists feed their babies?
Here comes the airplane...
HERE COMES THE SECOND ONE 👹
What is blue and sits in a corner? A baby in a baggy.
How do you fit 1000 babies in a swimming pool?
A blender.
How do you get them out? Slurp them up with a straw.
What's the similarity between a 14-year-old girl and the fetus inside her?
They're both thinking, "Oh fuck, mom is gonna kill me!"
Why shouldn’t you do drugs? Weedle make you high.
How can Pikachu make a baby laugh? By playing pika-boo!
What do babies and explosives have in common?
They both make a noise when you throw them.
What is red and cries and spins around and around?
- A baby in a microwave.
How do Taliban parents feed their babies?
"Here comes the plane... weeee, BOOM! 💥"
Why can't you ever fool an aborted baby?
Because it wasn't born yesterday!