Baby jokes

How do you make a baby astronaut sleep?

You rock-it!

My son.

What is not the definition of prostitution?

A dumb blonde that got money for babysitting. Does it cycle now?

Why was the baby Dinosaur an orphan?

His family was blown up by meteors.

What did Sophie Brussaux's baby get every week?

A face full of sperm.

How are babies and watermelons similar?

They are both fun to smash open with a sledgehammer and eat the insides.

What do you call a baby in the shower? A baby in the shower.

What's the difference between dark humor and normal humor?

Normal humor is ten babies and one trash can.

Dark humor is one baby and ten trash cans.

Scroll down for explanation.

Ten babies in one trash can; one baby in ten means that the baby was chopped up.

How did Mary get pregnant with baby Jesus?

God fucked her.

Q. What's an aborted baby's favourite type of humor? A. ...

I'm okay with giving babies iPads, as long as the baby has anencephaly.

You can't get brain rot if you don't have a brain!

Q. What do you say when your friend has an abortion?

A. May your baby rest in pieces.

What do you call someone who kisses primary school kids?

Joshua Metcalfe

I was in my car listening to my radio. Steve Winwood's song came on, "Just Roll With It, Baby." I said that must be one of Stephen Hawking's favorite songs; he sings it to his girlfriend.

What sits in the corner and gets smaller and smaller? A baby with a potato peeler.

My sister said that I am a baby, so I said, "Waa, waa."

Account for me too, baby👧! Is so cute together with game slot jokes.

What is an unborn baby's Olympic sport?

Dodge the coat hanger!

OnlyFans, but it’s me smacking your baby daddies with Twisted Tea.

Only Cans.

*having sex on lexapro*

Her: Cum for me, baby!

Me: I'm trying!