An old lady in the bank told me to check her balance so I pushed her over.
Grandma: young people your age are married by now,why aren’t you?
Me: old people your age are dead right now, why aren’t you?
I still remember my granpas last words: turn the lawn mower off!
Where can you find some of the world's largest vegetables? -- In an American nursing home.
A elderly woman and an elderly man were at a retirement home The man was shuffling a deck of cards for a card game The man asks "Is it your first time?" The woman replies "It's been a while since a man has asked me that."
Whenever my grandparents apologize, I say forgive and forget. They are really obedient.
2 old people sitting on a bench one turns to the other and says my butt fell asleep the other says yep i heard it snore a couple of times
When you push your grandma out of her wheelchair and steal it. “They see me rollin’, they hating”
Old man goes to the doctor. The doctor says "The test results are back, and I'm sad to say you have cancer and Alzheimer's.". The old man says "Phew! At least it's not cancer!"
I can’t watch anime anymore when my friends grandpa is in the house
He hasn’t heard a Japanese person scream since the war
Cheer Up!! Old age doesn't last that long!
my grandfather said I was to reliant on technology. I called him a hypocrite and unplugged his life support.
It want to die like my grandpa, with a blindfold and a wet sponge on his head
I farted in my grandma ́s breathing machine
So I heard Kenny's mom got moved to a nursing home. He'll probably leave her alone now. He doesn't eat vegetables.
my grandpa unplugged the AC so i unplugged his life support
My grandpa said I was too reliant on technology when he saw me on my phone, I called him a hypocrite and unplugged his life support.
tell an old person to pretend shaking salt in their mouth... you'll see
the twin towers collapsed faster then my grandma did.
Grandpa's last words,why do you have a chain saw
