Baby jokes
This shit is weird (as baby girl pees).
Dad: “Trust me, shitting is weirder.”
What's the difference between soccer and a dead baby?
I don't wear steel cap boots when I play soccer.
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What's the difference between a dead baby and an orange?
I don't keep a trash bag full of oranges in my basement.
What's the difference between a baby and a salad?
I'm not in jail for tossing a salad.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana.
Jack got high, touched Jill's thigh, and said, "I know you wanna."
But silly Jill forgot her pill, and now they have a kid.
Jack and Jill went up the hill, had some fun, now they have 4 babies.
Why shouldn’t you do drugs? Weedle make you high.
How can Pikachu make a baby laugh? By playing pika-boo!
My sister said that I am a baby, so I said, "Waa, waa."
Why don’t babies pollinate flowers?
God chose Plan B.
Wife: “I want another baby.”
Husband: “That’s a relief, I also really don’t like this one!”
What is it called when corn stalks have a baby?
The cream of the crop.
You can't call yourself a baby boomer if you have never detonated an infant.
Want to hear an abortion joke, or any joke for that matter? You have that option, and you can thank your mother for that.
But that's a question that will never be heard by an aborted unborn baby, whose only option was death. And that's no joke.
Why did the baby cow cross the road?
To find its mom who has the milk.
Where is the most dangerous place for a human being to be?
In the womb of a woman who wants to abort her unborn baby. 😢
I'm torn on the issue of abortion. I'm pro-abortion because it kills babies, but I'm against abortion because it gives women a choice.
What's the difference between an orphan and a baby?
The orphan gets back up.
If a baby cow finds a wolf pup, they will be best friends, but when mummy wolf comes, it’s a fight, so the baby cow and the wolf pup made it a secret, but one day the mummy cow and the mummy wolf found out, but no one got hurt. In fact, the mummy cow and the mummy wolf got to know each other, and baby cow and wolf pup were very happy and played all day long. Their friendship will never break.
-THE END-
This was not a joke but a meaning: if you are different, that doesn’t change who you are and your friends are, so be yourself and don’t let people break your dreams, and don’t forget them either. So no matter who you are, don’t let people change who you are. 🐺🐮
What's the difference between a yellow line and a baby?
You can't run over a yellow line.