Ares jokes
What if plants are farming us, giving us oxygen until we die, and turn into natural fertilizer which helps them?
My friend: What are you doing?
Me: I'm making holy water.
My friend: How?
Me: I'm boiling the hell out of it.
Roses are red, violets are blue, a face like yours belongs in a place worse than a zoo.
Luigi and Daisy are actually Aussie! How?
They wear GREEN and GOLD! The Aussie Colors!
As a brother, I have to report my sister has a few new symptoms that are going around, and those symptoms are that she has big titties, a sweet pussy, and a great personality.
What does a man and a gay prostitute have in common with a physically handicapped bisexual man? All three of them are very good at sucking your dick.
I said, "Are you half left or half right?"
"Neither! In-between."
"What?! In between your mom's tits when you go to sleep with her at night?"
Why are there blind people? Because there is.
Why are 9/11 victims the fastest readers in the world?
Because they went through 90 stories in just 10 seconds!
Why do orphans like Spider-Man?
100% of them are like him!
Me: Mom, if Adam and Eve are white, then how were slaves made?
Mom: Well, Eve and the monkey fucked each other.
Me: Oh, okay.
Goes to school.
Teacher: How were humans made?
Me: Eve fucked the monkeys.
Teacher: 😑
Everyone punch orphans. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
Women be like men are trash, [but] forgets women raised those men.
Friend (Evan): Did you do some dumb shit?
Me: Hell yeah.
Friend (Evan): Did you get us both in trouble?
Me: Hell yeah.
Friend (Evan): Will I still help you because you are my best friend?
Both: FUCK YEAH!
Sonic says: If you're bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
How old are 9/11 victims?
"There, toddlers, here come the airplane!"
Are people still mad at Hasan from that dog incident? All he wanted to do was become the world’s first lightningbender.
You are so fat you were able to occupy Wall Street all by yourself.
Orphans are just wannabe children. They want a family.
The fact I couldn't hear the announcements at my school because the boys in my advisory are clapping with no hands should be a joke just in itself. They were making sexual faces as well, oh, and don't forget the moaning they do.