Appliance jokes

So, a mom and a dad take their son to a therapist.

“What seems to be the problem?” the therapist asked.

“Our son thinks he’s a refrigerator!” they said.

So the therapist replies, “Oh dear, that must be a problem.”

“Yeah, he sleeps with his mouth open, and the light is really bright.”

What is red, white, and goes round and round?

A baby in a blender.

What's the difference between a homo and a refrigerator?

A refrigerator doesn't fart when you pull your meat out.

What’s the difference between a microwave and a 10 year old girl?

The microwave doesn’t fart out blood and diarrhea when you pull your meat out.

What's black, white, and red all over?

A nun in a blender.

I made a joke about putting babies in the microwave and got told I was a disgusting person.

So from now on I’ll only make baby in the deep fryer jokes.

When I found out that my toaster wasn’t waterproof, I was shocked.

I got stuck in the dryer again. Brother, say less.

Remember back in the day when your TV wouldn't work so you'd bang it a few times?

I tried that with my dishwasher, but unfortunately, she ended up pregnant...

My husband left a note on the fridge that said, "This isn't working." I'm not sure what he's talking about. I opened the fridge door and it's working fine!

What happens when you put a baby in a blender?

The baby is a cherry smoothie.

What's the difference between a gay man and a freezer?

A freezer doesn't fart when you pull the meat out.

What's thick and has ice in it when you take it out of a blender?

A baby smoothie.

"This vacuum sucks!"

Vacuum: "Yes, I do."

You make the juice go through my power brick.

How are a gay guy and a refrigerator different?

When you pull the meat out of the refrigerator, it doesn’t fart.

What's the difference between a gay guy and an oven?

An oven doesn't fart when you take your meat out.

I named my refrigerator Oicurmt, because every time I look in, I say, "O I C, U R MT."

Is your refrigerator running? "Yeah, I guess." Well, you better go catch it! Haha, I'm a girl, it's funny!

What’s the difference between God and Hitler?

God made thousands of bread, Hitler made thousands of toast.