Are you a toaster? Because I want to take a bath with you ;)
I'm like a broken refrigerator, cool but broken inside.
What do you call it when a midget waves at you?
A microwave.
You wanna know what's the difference between a girl and a refrigerator? "A refrigerator doesn't moan when I put my meat in it."
I started beating my washing machine because it wasn't working, my wife started crying.
What is red and tan and spins for about 50 mph?
A baby in a blender.
What's the difference between an asshole and a freezer?
The freezer doesn't fart when you pull the meat out.
What's the difference between you and a fridge? The fridge doesn't moan when I put my meat in.
Where do you buy a dishwasher?
Hot singles in your area.
what do you call a baby in an oven? my next meal
I got my daughter a fridge for her birthday. I can’t wait to see her face light up when she opens it.
What is the difference between a washing machine and a hooker? I can put a load in the washing machine without it following me.
What do you do when your dish washer stops working
Hit your wife harder
Crispy, Juicy, Tender, I just put my new-born son in a blender.
What's white and can't climb a tree?
A refrigerator.
What’s the best way to get a baby out of a blender? Tortilla Chips.
Whats black, white, and red all over? a penguin in a blender
Whats all fuzzy, warm, and laughing? The person who snapped its neck and put it into the blender
The Toaster: The best bath bomb!
What's Red,Green and goes 90 miles an hour? A frog in a blender.
What is red and very rare?
A child in a blender.