Appliance jokes
Why do they call it oven, when you of in the cold food of out hot eat the food?
Your mum is so cool, she looks like a fridge. Quote: Jude Porters.
Did you hear about Fridgetair
Kelvinator?
What did Pavol Demitra think before the Yaroslavl plane hit the ground?
"Oh shit, did I leave the stove on at home?"
What do you get when you put a baby in a blender? An extraction.
What do women and appliances have in common?
If they don't work, hit them until they work.
A toaster and a slice of whole wheat bread sit together in the sauna.
After five minutes, the bread starts to sweat extremely and says: "Oh, I think I'm going to be a toast in here!"
The toaster just looks at it bored from the side and replies: "Don't get upset. I'm just here to really switch off."
What do you do when your dishwasher stops working? Slap it on the arse and tell it to keep going!
Why do brides wear white?
So they match the kitchen appliances.
"I put the tin foil in the microwave, ma!"
What do you call a baby with red on it?
A baby in a microwave.
What's the difference between a blonde and a refrigerator?
Refrigerators don't queef when you pull your meat out.
Wanna know what my favorite feeling is? Warmth. Fuck, I left the oven on!
What did the blender say to the orange juice?
"What the fuck are you, you are so fucking stupid, shut the fuck up."
What do you call a baby in a blender? A baby blender!
How do you clean ash off a stove with chemicals?
Is your fridge running?
Why yes, it is!
Then you better go catch it!
What do you call a redhead in a fridge?
I'm pretty sure her name was Kelly.
What did the egg say to the blender? Nothing. It's an egg joke.
There was a cleaning lady with a vacuum cleaner. She sucked!