Light travels faster than sound. That's why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
wantto know something funny me cuz im funny looking
A wild Iceberg appears! Titanic uses ram! It is not very effective. ( Titanic sinks. )
Just hire some people to be fake parents and print off an adoption appear on April fools the just leve them there at the orphanage APRIL FOOLS!
A snorlax was in a bar. And he was drinking beer when an Eevee and a Rockruff hopped onto a stool. The Eevee ordered an oranberry special for the both of them.
Snorlax: Y'all make the perfect couple.
Random Zorua: Dragonite, is it just an illusion, or is that snorlax fatter than this region?
A wild Iceberg appears. Go titanic! Titanic uses Headbutt The attack misses Titanic Faints
Which Book takes an extreme turn and has an incredible Plot Twist?
-The math Bookšš¢. Suddenly letters š appear in the calculations...
My friend had an allergic reaction after he ate a peanut. We got his EpiPen to help him when penaldo appeared because he heard the word PEN. He tried stealing the pen but I said "no pens for you". And ābrentfordā.He cried and ran away. Shame on you penaldo the fraud.
A man gets on a bus, and ends up sitting next to a very attractive nun. Enamored with her, he asks if he can have sex with her. Naturally, she says no, and gets off the bus. The man goes to the bus driver and asks him if he knows of a way for him to have sex with the nun.
"Well," says the bus driver, "every night at 8 o'clock, she goes to the cemetery to pray. If you dress up as God, I'm sure you could convince her to have sex with you."
The man decides to try it, and dresses up in his best God costume. At eight, he sees the nun and appears before her.
"Oh, God!" she exclaims. "Take me with you!" The man tells the nun that she must first have sex with him to prove her loyalty. The nun says yes, but tells him she prefers anal sex. Before you know it, they're getting down to it, having nasty, grunty, loud sex. After it's over, the man pulls off his God disguise.
"Ha, ha! I'm the man from the bus!"
"Ha, ha!" says the nun, removing her costume. "I'm the bus driver!"
If u r talking to Indian and noticed a red dot appear on their forehead, be careful of what u said... They r recording it down... Careful... (no offense) pure joke.
When your friend does a finger-gun and his dad appears behind him and does it too, with the real deal
I was watching my boyfriends dog while he took a shower. I started playing fetch with the him when the ball went over the balcony. He went to get it and fell 10 stories. When i looked down, he appeared to be dead. My boyfriend loved his dog and I didn't know what to do ,so feeling awful, I sat on the couch and waiting for him to come back. About three minutes later he got out of the shower. He ordered some food and went to the table to eat when I said ,āyou know , your dogs been a little depressed lately...ā
A prisoner dug out of prison, he appeared in a playground, he said, "I'm free, I'm free." A kid said, "so what I'm four."
Fineman, Einstein and Schrodinger walked into a bar.
Fineman says "it appears we're inside a joke".
Einstein says "but only to an observer who saw us walk in simultaneously".
To which Schrodinger says "if someone's looking through the window, I'm leaving".
What appears over Ashās head when he gets an idea? A LightBulbasaur.
A brunette, a red-head, and a blonde are being chased by bandits. They are chased to the edge of a cliff and a genie appears. "I will help you escape," says the genie, "say what you wish to turn into, and you will become that thing." The brunette jumps off the cliff and says "Hawk." She turns into a hawk and flies away. The red-head says "Falcon." She turns into a falcon and flies away. Now the blonde is alone and the bandits are getting closer. She makes her decision and backs up, then runs toward the cliff. And...she trips and says "Crap."
The End
Vladimir Putin, Donald Trump and Angela Merkel are standing at the shore and are trying to impress each other with the accomplishments of their countries. Putin brags āWe have nuclear submarines which can stay under water for six weeks without having to resurface!ā. Trump goes on āSix weeks? Thatās nothing. I have the best submarines, theyāre underwater fĆ¼r at least three months!ā. Merkel is about to respond, when a giant steel colossus emerges from the sea. A hatch opens, a black uniform appears - āHeil Hitler! We need Diesel.ā
Jesus and his friend went fishing they both cast the line out and both of them get a bite but Jesus's friend misses and says "damn I missed" jesus said "that's a bad sentence to say if you say it 3 time something bad will happen to you" they cast it out again and both get a bite and Jesus's friend misses again and says "damn I missed" jesus replied "if you say that one more time something bad will happen" they cast out again and Jesus's friends line snaps and he says "damn I missed" jesus said "that's the last time something bad will happen" the biggest thunder storm ever seen appeared and a lightning bolt struck jesus and a voice came from the clouds "damn I missed"
I was playing FIFA and out of nowhere the game glitched during a penalty shootout. Pionel Pessi appeared out of nowhere, took my pen and skied it. Thanks to him, I'm out of UCL and was sacked in Career Mode. Shame on you Pessi!š”š”š”š”
Three boys are playing on a slide when a genie appeared.
The genie says "what ever you shout when you go down the slide, I will grant you a bucket full of."
The first boy goes down the slide shouting "diamonds!", and he gets a bucket of diamonds.
The second boy goes down the slide and shouts "gold!", and gets a bucket of gold.
The third boy, who never listens or pays attention, goes down the slide and shouts "weeeeeeee!".
