Animal jokes

Why did the zebra cross the road?

What do clams do on their birthday? They shell-brate, but they eat all the cake for themselves because they’re shellfish!

Why do seagulls not fly over the bay?

Because if they did, they'd be bay gulls.

Do you know how a snail has a "nail," why can't it be a nut?

What do you call a stupid pig? A pious.

What is the difference between an orphan and a snake?

A snake has a home to go to underground.

Why did the squirrel ask for a pay raise?

He was paid peanuts.

I wanted to tell an animal joke but it's irrelephant.

What did the cow say every morning?

Good moorning!

I read a story about a rabbit being raised. It was a hare-raising tale!

I love working with animals, especially when I get to hear their cries of help.

What do you call a dog with no legs?

...You can't call it anything. It won't come to you.

What do you call a dead fly? -- A flew.

What happened when the cheetah took too many baths?

He became spotless!!!

How do you count cows with a cowculator?

Why couldn’t the leopard play hide and seek? Because he was always spotted.

In a world of feline folly, There lived a cat with a secret, A taste for adventure and mischief, And a love for KFC's golden treat.

With eyes like emerald jewels, And fur as black as night, This feline prowled the streets, In search of a savory delight.

Oh, how it yearned for chicken, Crispy and finger-lickin' good, But the cat knew it had to be sly, To satisfy its craving like it should.

Through alleyways it stealthily tiptoed, With nimble paws and a stealthy glide, Until it stumbled upon a secret, That made its hunger amplified.

A stash of KFC's golden eggs, Hidden away from prying eyes, An accidental treasure trove, A feast fit for a feline paradise.

With each stolen egg devoured, The cat's satisfaction grew, The taste of crispy breading, And juicy chicken, it knew.

Word soon spread of this food bandit, A legend of a cat so bold, Whispers echoed through the town, Of the one who stole the KFC gold.

But the cat with the KFC get eggs, Remained a mystery to all, A phantom of the night it became, Leaving no trace, no trail to recall.

And so, it continues its nightly quest, For chicken that satisfies its soul, The cat with the KFC get eggs, Forever on the prowl, never to be controlled.

You cat to be kitten me right meow!

Roses are red, violets are blue, when I saw you I thought of the zoo and monkeys too!

Why do lions always lose at poker?

Because they always play against cheetahs.