Animal jokes
If you humped a whale, it would humpback.
How do you turn a duck into a soul singer?
Put him in the microwave until his bill Withers.
Why did the baby cross the road?
Because it was stapled to the chicken.
How do bees 🐝 get to school?
They ride the school buzz!
What happens when a frog parks illegally?
It gets toad.
What do bats like to eat?
Bloodsuckers! 🩸🍭😂
Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they don’t have any pockets.
What's the difference between a Doberman Pinscher and a Social Worker?
Eventually, you can get a baby back from a Doberman Pinscher.
What do you call a skeleton snake?
A rattler!
How does a penguin build a house?
Igloos it together.
What’s a squirrel’s favorite OTT? Nut-Flix.
What do you call a dolphin in the woods? Dead.
What do you call a gay dinosaur?
A mega-sore-ass.
If two eagles make a baby and two sparrows make a baby, what makes no baby?
Two swallows.
What's a kind of cat that lives in the water? Octopus.
What did one squirrel say to the other? "Do you have any nuts?"
What do you call 2 octopuses that look the same? Identical!
Where does an octopus put its money? In an octo-purse!
What did one cow say to the other? You are mootiful!
How do you keep a bull from charging?
You take its credit card away.
Why don't Bald Eagles like fast food? It always runs away!