Animal jokes
What does a human and a cat have in common? Both take my bed.
Why did the zebra cross the road?
Why do seagulls not fly over the bay?
Because if they did, they'd be bay gulls.
Why are baby elephants so smart? They hang out with friends!
Did you hear the story about the eel? It was shocking! 😂😂😂😂😂
Why did the skunk cross the road?
To get to the odor side!
You're so bald, when you wear a turtleneck, you look like one!
Little Johnny got a dog without ears, and then they invited their neighbors over. Then they asked what his name was. The owners said, "We didn't name him anything, because there's no reason. Because when we called his name, he wouldn't come."
What do you call a pig with two legs? Meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhhahahaa
I walked up to a cat and started to sing a song. The cat said, "HECK NO!" then ran off. I follow it while still singing "BABY COME HOME TO ME!!"
What’s black and white and red all over?
A crushed nun!
What’s that black stuff between an elephants toes?
Slow natives.
Why did the rapper become a beekeeper?
Because he wanted to make some HONEY FLOWS.
What do you call a dancing cow that dies while dancing?
Dead mooves.
What happened to the chicken after he died? He did not say anything, so I don't know.
Elephant
Why did the otter cross the road?
To get to the otter side.
Dog walks into a bar and says, "I'm lookin' for the man who shot my paw."
Cousin: Hey, is that an octopus?
Me: Yes, what, it is just an octopus.
Cousin: Oh yeah, ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Octopus touch me!
Me: What, it is just one..... ummmmm dad cousin d[id].
What do you call a cow who walks on two legs?
Lean beef.
What was the doctor's diagnosis on a dinosaur with a low sex drive? Teraerectile dysfunction.