An Eskimo was holidaying in New Zealand and while driving his rented car around the countryside it broke down. A bloke passing by offered to help, lifted the bonnet and said, "I know your problem, you blew a seal." The Eskimo with a shocked expression retorted, "Yeah? Well you fuck sheep!"
A man and a giraffe walk into a bar, the man orders a beer one for him and one for the giraffe. After they finish their drinks the giraffe falls over and the man gets his stuff and heads for the door. The bartender says "Stop! you can't leave that thing lying on the floor" The man says "Mate, that's not a lion, it's a giraffe".
Cow: *can't be milked for 20 years*
9/11:
What did the cheetah tell the other cheetah when they had a test?
Cheetah cheetah!
why did the chicken cross the road? whos gives a shit i wanna know how it got the car started
What's a cat's favourite colour? Purrple
Have you heard about the animal that was made of a human hand?
It's an ARMadillo
What is a rabbit's favorite type of jewelry? Carats
What is a cow's favorite water sport?
Ca-MOO-ing
Once a cheetah, always a cheetah.
what is red and green and goes 100 miles per hour? A frog in a blender
what is the difference between a cow and me
nothing
What do you call a cow that doesn't produce any milk? An udder failure.
I read a story about a rabbit being raised. It was a hare-raising tale!
What do you call the bear that pushes all the other bears into the pool?
The dry bear.
What is a chicken's favorite day of the week? Fri day.
What did the cow say every morning Good moorning!!
What time is it when you get home can you walk walk and a car and get home and get a walk home and get a dog 🐕 today is the night I can drive
Octopus more like octopussy
Elephant
