Animal jokes
Yo mama so fat, if she buys a fur coat, the WHOLE SPECIES will become extinct!
Why did the cats go in the litterbox?? To take a poop!
I met an orphan with a dog yesterday. I chose the dog.
Why do cows have big [udders]? Because they have big balls.
What's black and red/read all over? A baby skunk with a bad case of diaper rash!
Quack, quack, quack, quack, quack, quack.
Where do cows go to see the big screen? The mooo-vie theater.
What is a cow's favorite water sport?
Ca-MOO-ing!
Roses are red, violets are blue, a face like yours belongs in a place worse than a zoo.
What happens when a frog's car breaks down?
It gets toad away!
A horse, a fox, and a bunny join together and make a rock band. They started doing tiny gigs, but they got famous and went on tour. They all got so famous it went to their heads, and the band disbanded. The fox made his, and the bunny made her own. The horse was sad that the band was no more, so he went to a bar, and the bartender asked why the long face?
Q: Why did baby shark cross the Pacific Ocean?
A: To find his dad.
This had me wheezing 😂🤣😂🤣
What do you call a pig who knows how to use a knife? A pork chop.
What does a cow use in school? A cowculator.
What happened when the dog played golf?
He hit the ball into the ruff.
What turns green, purple, and white? A chameleon.
How do you stop a dog from humping your leg?
Suck its cock.
What do George Washington and a beaver have in common?
They both have eyes.
- What do you call a bee who flew to United States? - "USB"
Q. What do they call an ISIS terrorist who owns both a camel and a goat?
A. Bisexual.