Animal jokes
Why did the turtle cross the road?
We don't know yet.
OOF dislike plz I have no life XD.
All of these jokes are DED sub to pewdipie.
My dog has no nose.
How does he smell?
Terrible!
Can I tell you a cat joke?
Yes, 'cause it's purr-fect.
What did the turkey say to the turkey hunter?
"Quack, quack."
How many times does it take to make an octopus laugh?
Tentacles!
What is a dog that does not walk? A magic dog.
Q: How did we learn cats don't land on their feet?
A: We asked Mufasa from the Lion King.
I have the heart of a lion and a lifetime ban at the New York Zoo.
Shaenaya likes goat dick.
What's the difference between a duck?
One of its legs are both the same!
Two cows are standing in a field.
Cow 1: Did you hear about the outbreak of mad cow disease?
Cow 2: Good thing I'm a helicopter.
Knock knock.
Who is there?
Cows go.
Cows go who?
No, cows go moooooooooooo, not whooooooooooooooooooooo!
Why did I shoot my dog?
Because it pissed me offff! Ahhhhhahahahahahahahahaha! 👌👌😎
What makes a bird fly?
Bird food!
A duck walks into a bar and says, "Got any bread?"
The bartender says, "No bread here."
And then the duck says, "Got any bread?"
And the bartender says, "Didn't I just f***ing say that there was no bread here?"
And the duck says, "Got any bread?!"
And the bartender says, "You stupid duck! Or should I say d***? There's no bread here. Don't make me say that again, or I'll pin you to the wall with a nail."
So the duck says, "Got any nails?"
And then the bartender looks surprised, and says, "Of course I've got f***ing nails. Can't you see them?"
And the duck says, "Got any bread?"
And the bartender throws the duck out of the bar.
What happened to the dog that crossed the road?
What did one Koala say to the other?
"Help me I'm burning. Aaaugh!!! Oh fuck oh fuck I'm on fire!! AAAAaugh!"
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side!
What does a cow sound like when in a horror house?
Moo mooo moooooooo (screaming)!
Octopussy.