Animal jokes
Three boy chihuahua were hot about this girl chihuahua. She tells them, "I will date whichever one of you can use liver and cheese in the same sentence."
First dog says, "I love cheese, but liver is bland."
She replies, "Really original."
Next dog, "I love liver, but cheese makes me constipated."
She replies, "Ew, gross."
Third dog steps up, "Man, liver alone cheese mine."
Winner dog 3.
There is this fish, and this fish thinks if that fly drops 6 inches, I’m gonna jump out the water and eat that fucking fish!
Then there is a bear, he thinks if that fly drops six inches, that fish jumps up - I’m gonna run out there and eat that fucking fish!
This huntsman also thinks to himself 🧐 if that fly drops six inches, fish jumps up, bear runs out, eats the fish. I’m gonna shoot that fucking bear.
Unbelievably there is a tiny little brave mouse, who also thinks to himself 🧐 if that fly drops six inches, fish jumps, bear runs, huntsman shoots,
He’s bound to drop that cheese sandwich in his back pocket!!!!
I’m gonna eat that fucking cheese sandwich!!
Meanwhile...
there’s This cat!!!’ He sees what’s going on - if they fly drops six inches -the fish =bear =huntsman =mouse eating the cheese sarnie....
Easy pickings...
Anyway bang 💥 the fly drops six inches. Fish jumps up. Bear grabs the fish. Huntsman shoots the fucking bear,
DROPS HIS CHEESE SARNIE!!
Cat runs after mouse trying to get the cheese sarnie
The cat slips over him (stacks it) cat falls in the river...
LONG STORY I KNOW BUT THE MORAL OF THE STORY IS...
every time a fly drops six inches a pussy get wet)
WALLOP... try remembering all that in A pub pissed. Xx
What do you call a stick that comes back a chicken?
Meow meow meow meow :p
Lol, dick, I'm the dick and duck.
Memes
What do you call a penguin in the desert?
Lost!!!!!!! Hahahaha. Banta everyone on this site has 0 life and should leave.
What did the chicken say when he crossed the road?
Quack!
Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.
What do you call a dog with no legs?
It doesn't f***ing matter, it's still not f***ing coming.
Fam, you weaker than a polar bear!
My dog is named Max, and he likes to eat dog food. Therefore, everyone named Max likes to eat dog food.
Why are cheetahs big cats? Because they poo and purr.
Oh, Mom, there is poop in the toilet still.
Mom: Oh, that was me and the dog.
Me: Wait, what????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
What is a fish without an eye?
A fsh, LOL!
I put a Dalmatian in a washing machine and killed him.
I love to smell skunks, but I lick their stinky butt. It's delicious. My breath smells like fart.
This boy's eyebrow was so bushy, everyone thought that it was a squirrel tail! XD
Why does a cheetah cheat to always win?
Dees was a squirrel who had big nuts.
Everybody loved dees big nuts.
Now their owner is dying.
HAHAHAHA